When I was younger I always imagined having a perfect relationship and finding my “prince charming” and living life like a fairy tale. As I got older I was starting to give up on that whole idea. I was only fifteen and already I had been and multiple relationships and most of which involved me being cheated on and questioning why I wasn’t good enough and if fairy tales are just that.
After being in a relationship you feel hurt and lonely when it’s over and after it happens, again and again, you decide maybe this is just how it is-- maybe fairy tales are just fictional like in books and movies. You start to lose sight of what it really is you were looking for in the first place. You wanted someone to make you feel wanted and important that you compromised on feeling like you matter rather than finding what matters. Love isn’t about everything being perfect and happy twenty-four-seven, it’s about the happy times and the bad ones. It’s about when a hard time hits you stand through the storm together. It’s about finding that one person who lets you be yourself and doesn’t judge you for it. Love is special and you won’t find it right away especially when you are settling on feeling wanted rather than loved.
When I was younger I just wanted to have that feeling like you get when you watch a romantic movie. You want someone to make you feel pretty and happy and not so alone. So you find someone who likes you, and yes they may be attractive and make you feel pretty and important but do you have things in common, do you connect? Is this person your best friend who you feel you could tell anything to? Don’t settle for feeling happy because they make you feel important. Love takes time and trust me it’s worth the wait.
If you settled on a guy because he made you happy but you don’t love him than he should just be a friend. While you are holding on to him even though you don’t love him? You could be letting your real love pass you by.
When I was almost sixteen I found love. It made me realize all those guys from before I never really loved, what I loved was how they made me feel. I wanted so badly to feel special that I didn’t really know that there was more to love. When I finally found love it was different. We could tell each other everything even our deepest darkest secrets. We’ve been together for almost 4 years now and he knows things even my closest friends don’t know and I know things he has never told any other person too. We connect and I can see a future with him. Before I never really saw a future and kids with any of the other guys. He is not only the love of my life but he is my best friend. I can’t possibly imagine my life without him in it. Yes, we have fights and hard times like every relationship has, the only difference is we don’t give up. We are there for each other through the tough stuff. We fight but we don’t let it come between us-- we work it out because that’s what you do when you love someone.
When I look back I think of how naive I was to think that any of those other relationships were love. I think how stupid I was to almost let those bad experience close me off to what is the best thing in my life. I think how I could have settled on feeling happy and important and ended up missed out on true love. Don’t let wanting to feel special blind you from the real thing. Like they say in the movie aquamarine, “Love is the closest thing we have to magic.”
