One of the most profound insights I've had in college came during a group assignment in the Spring Semester of my Sophomore Year. The class was Sociology of the Family. It was a perfect spring day, my group was gathered around a table right outside the business building. It was composed of about 4 girls, and myself. I felt a little odd, but it also felt kinda cool to be the only guy in the group--- in like a "The feminine energy is a cool change up" kind of way. I had had trouble with girls that whole year, but also all of my life. It was either hard to meet people I vibed with, or if I did I had no clue where to go from there. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't hoping for being in an "all girl" group to benefit me in some way--- and it did --- in a way.

One of the girls mentioned how her and her boyfriend had just broken up, and how she felt weird. She was on the topic of dating other guys, clarifying intentions, not wanting to get into something just yet, but the most profound part of her complaints was the statement, "I just don't know how to talk to guys!!!"

This kinda baffled me, she had just gotten out of a long term relationship, yet she had no clue how to talk to guys? Furthermore, it was an ad-lib of what I had always told myself, "I have no clue how to talk to girls." I realized then, that NO ONE knows what the fuck they are doing. In the same way I had no clue how to talk to a girl I was interested in or felt like I never knew what to do or say-- neither did anyone else.

This I had always sorta known. There's no set guides to life, it kinda just is, and we, as humans, assign meaning and words to everything. However in the genre of dating, I had always thought of it as "I know nothing, that cute girl, knows everything, I need to do the right thing to be successful". Hearing that girl say "I have no clue how to talk to guys" nearly flipped a switch, it showed me that I was wrong in how I viewed it, and that actually-- more often than not--- that "cute girl" very well could have thought that same thing in her about me, "Oh my god, I don't know what to do or say".

Funnily enough, I had already been snapping the girl who would eventually become my girlfriend, not in a "I like this girl" kinda way, but in a "This is my friend Mia and I'm just sending a dumb pic of myself" kinda way. I sent a snap describing this revelation and my reaction, to which she replied "See no one has a clue", which of course triggered a "Holy shit even she feels like she has no clue what she's doing! That's crazy! She seemed like she did when I was with her!"

I of course voiced my revelation to the group, "Holy shit, I'm always telling myself that in regards to girls, but I never thought that girls also felt that way." They laughed at this, maybe because they had no clue guys thought that way, but also because what I was really saying I was surprised at was, "Oh wow! Other people experience the same thing I do!" which is painfully obvious once one stops and ponders.

We're all humans, flying through space on this green rock at the end of the day. None of us really know why or how we got here, just that we are, and we'll never truly know why or how. So uh... we might as well just accept it and make the best we can out of being here