There are a lot of great parents out there.
Parents that are supportive, kind, selfless, responsible, reliable, and loving.
These parents are the same people who will get up extra early just to make sure they have a good seat to your volleyball tournament.
They're the same parents-who despite their phone being eligible for the next up-grade will give it to you because they know you'd enjoy it more.
They're the same damn parents who put their kids before them when it comes to absolutely everything. and I'm lucky enough to have those kind of people as parents.
Others though? They're not so lucky.
I've witnessed firsthand, friends who got the short end of the stick when it came to "who raised them". Whether that was because they dragged their child through marital problems, or simply spent more time going out than they did raising their kid. You've probably seen them too? The parent who has done nothing productive with their life, and projects all of that anger out on their child…or the one who finds a reason to never work, and seems to always come up short when the rent is due…luckily they have a kid working at the moment, so maybe they could spot them? Or the parent that just works too much; can never swing a sporting event or make it for pictures before a big dance..
I've seen it all.
My least favorite kind of parent, though, is the one who spends their time pretending they're a great one on social media, but falling short when it comes to ACTUAL parenting.
In my opinion, it's like a group project. You don't do any of the work, but you want all the credit.
So your kid graduated college-you don't tell them in person you're proud of them, but you're the first person to boast on social media about all of their accomplishments.
You missed all their late night phone calls though..crying about how stressed they were with the tests they didn't know if they could pass or the food they kept forgetting to eat. That wasn't worthy of your time, but making sure the world knew that you had at least one thing going for you, was..
Your kid just got married-you never really even got to know to WHO, but social media needs to know your kid is no longer a loner.
Just had a baby? Screw actually getting to know your grandchild, but post on social media about the baby! That will get a few hundred likes and comments for sure.
Social Media Parents paint this perfect, ideal picture they think all of their old friends would be surprised to see. "This guy was a shitty person in Highschool, but wow!..his daughter graduated college, his son just got married, and they're both expecting a baby with their new spouses! What a family man!"
I've felt rather strongly about a lot of things-most pertained to my own life. I'm genuinely glad this doesn't because I can't imagine having a parent that's just so selfish. A parent that cares more about their own reputation than they do about actually being there for their kid.
A parent whose sole purpose in life is to make it seem like they've been something to someone that they actually haven't.
You can take your pictures, and sure, you can post them.
You can ignore the phone calls, but pretend you took them.
You can think your child's success somehow relates to you because you "raised" them (according to social media anyway).
But at the end of the day the only thing you are to your children is a fake. You're someone who has taught them how to feel invisible. How to make it seem like their life online is so much better than the life they were actually dealt.
But the thing about social media is it truly only paints a picture.
You can Photoshop a picture to make it look like you have beautiful blonde hair, but if in real life your hair is short and yellow-realistically-how long do you believe you can hide that for?
Just like your responsibility and role as a parent-eventually people will see you for the parent you are because-just like any other social media situation-you can only hide behind that screen and persona for so long.
My advice?
Put the phone down.
Stop taking the pictures.
Stop bragging on new jobs/graduations you didn't work for nor care about when it was actually happening.
Stop showing off a grand-baby you've never met or have any intention on meeting.
Let go of the idea that you're worthy of bragging rights because your child is your child.
If you've never been an actual parent, you have no right to pretend to others that you have.
& That's The Tea.
