I have avoided writing this article, almost as much as I have avoided talking to you. I have no need to point out who you are, what you are to me, or what I see you've made of your life now that you are doing your own thing...because you know who you are, and that's all that matters, right?

I disagree with your decision. God matters. Your church matters. Your congregation matters. Or at least it used to.

There are two types of people who consciously leave the church (this excludes children who are forced to leave because of their parents).

The ones who leave to go to another church because it's "better" and the ones who come to church less and less and decide that not coming is better.

I'll address them in order. The first one may seem like a huge stab in the back by comparison, but I actually have a lot more positive things to say about someone who chooses to go to a different church.

The church that I attend is currently fighting a struggle, having lost the entire group of Pastoral leadership within a year and about a third of the congregation followed. This happens all over the country, and we are no different. People attend church for growth, fellowship and dutiful reasons. So when one or all of these reasons is affected or disappears, our first instinct is to find a place that can provide everything that we need in a church for our "best worship experience".

So we wander, we explore other churches, we pull back from our responsibilities in our home church so that if it sinks, we aren't brought down with it.

What I think people forget is that God is the only one who can provide everything that we need in a church. God is our growth, He is our fellowship, our duty is to Him and Him alone!

What you failed to realize is that your home church, the one struggling, the one that's no longer "good enough" to provide the perfect worship experience, is still a house of God, and deserves to be treated as such. Now, that's not to say that you should never leave your church. What I am contesting is the need to run away from a church for selfish reasons.

Your beloved pastor leaving to take on new challenges elsewhere is not a good reason to leave. Creative differences between generations is not a good reason to leave. So help me God, if your significant other is the reason you leave the church, then you are worshiping something other than God. Love is very important, but God is of utmost importance.

Now that I've really hurt some peoples' feelings, let's talk positive. Your walk with God is yours and yours alone. You do need to do what's best for you, and I praise those who have switched churches because you are still, hopefully, receiving the seed and growing with God, just somewhere else.

Let's address those who have decided not to come anymore for other reasons, now.

After high school, I had two jobs that I worked 40 hours a week, nights and weekends, was in youth group, the praise band, the dance team, and I was also in school full time. I was also burnt out. So I backed out of just about everything. I went to work and school and that was about it. I showed up on Sundays, though.

I made sure that my work schedule never conflicted with church, because my relationship with God is the most important thing in my life, and church was my refresher before a new week...every week. There were so many Sundays where I woke up and wished that I didn't have to go to church, especially when I knew I was going to be there all day and then go straight to work.

Now, a couple years later, I wake myself up at 7am every Sunday to go to church and be a part of the praise team that leads off the service. That is my accountability to go to church. I still work. I still maintain my social life, and my relationship with God is better than it's ever been.

I understand as much as anyone else that sleep and social events seem much more important than one or two Sundays at church, but what really bothers me is that the summer before you went to college. You decided that church wasn't necessary anymore.

That you had all you needed at home and no longer needed to go to church because it was just a hassle. I pray for you guys, those of you who would rather sleep in than spend time in God. I pray that you receive the Word and are nourished in love and spirit regularly, because I know what it's like to go through every day without feeling God, because I had forgotten Him at one point, too.

That is why I would rather you just switch churches! I want you to be whole, and I know that you are a Christian, and that deep down you want that part of your life back, because we are friends. We have known each other for five years, spent a lot of time discussing God and faith and life, and I am so sorry that things in your life have gotten that busy that you have forgotten what used to be most important to you.

I did not write this article to make anyone come back to church, but you know what...I hope it did hurt your feelings enough to make you think, to make you pray. Your absence has affected me personally, but I will survive, because I have God. Every day. Please, next time you're questioning your church or your lack of church, pray about it, reach out, whatever you have to do.

Love you all!