In just eighteen (soon to be nineteen) years, I've met a lot of different types of people. Some I have gotten along with extremely well whereas some I have clashed with almost instantly.
Then there are the people that I should have immediately clashed with, but I consistently attempted to look past their faults to maintain a relationship for whatever reason. Friends, family, whatever. We all have had friendships and relationships like that where we find ourselves putting in more effort than what we get in return.
Certain people in my life have come and gone. For the longest time, I was attempting to keep them in my life despite their obvious desire to not be associated with me. I did this for a plethora of reasons--mostly, I felt this undying sense of loyalty to them. This loyalty led me to put up with their treatment of me, even when literally everyone else in my life tried to warn me.
This first semester of college has been a real eye-opener for me. Being removed from the high school environment and the same kids that I grew up with since third grade has been an amazing experience for me. Through this separation, I've managed to see that many of the friendships that I had in high school were completely one-sided. I was holding onto friends that never really had any intention of being friends with me.
When something better came along, I was the first person they dropped. Maybe I wasn't "fun" enough because I worked 20 hour weeks and enjoyed the company of adults more than kids my own age. Maybe I was too "weird" because I always had these crazy ideas (that somehow, I always managed to pull off despite everyone else's lack of support). I'm not really sure what was wrong with me that led these people to not want to associate with me.
To be honest, I don't really care.
I was always familiar with the term "ghosting," but it was in college when I really discovered how prevalent it is in our society. So many people this semester just "dropped" me. I'm not sure their reasons, but it doesn't matter.
Being home now on winter break has also been an eye-opener. Friends who had promised to get together once we were all home are now suddenly too busy to hang out (and then I see them hanging out with others around town). All I can do is shrug my shoulders at that and continue marching to the beat of my own drum.
I am done with trying to make sure people stay in my life. If you want to walk out, the door is wide open.
I'm sure everyone can relate to this, whether it is with friends, significant others, or family members. You do not owe anyone anything. You are you. And if someone truly wants to be in your life, then they will put in the effort to be there. Don't stress yourself out trying to keep relationships just for the sake of having relationships.
So, to reiterate, to everyone who has walked out...