“What do you wanna be when you grow up?”
I got asked that seemingly innocent question all the time when I was younger. It seemed harmless enough. I've wanted to be a nurse, a dentist, an actress — I've even wanted to be a model.
But then I started narrowing it down. I've always had an interest in fashion, so naturally, I wanted to become a fashion designer.
I took a design and interior fashion class my freshman year of high school. That's when I discovered my hatred for pins and needles (and the cursed sewing machine).
So, I shifted gears. I joined DECA my sophomore year and thought I had finally found my true calling: business.
That dream was pretty short-lived. I hated math, and if I had to be stuck behind a cubicle, crunching numbers for the rest of my life, I’d probably explode.
Then, junior year rolled around and I got really into Project Runway: All Stars.
The new plan was to go to FIDM. I was going to graduate high school, move out to California, and pursue my new dream of becoming a stylist...
I’ll just get right to it — I didn’t end up going to FIDM. I joined my local community college’s journalism program and finished up my associates there instead.
I was also able to live out my new dream of being a fashion journalist by being a staff writer for their news organization.
For the first time in my life, I felt like I knew what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. What I “wanna be when I grew up.”
And I really thought that was it. I was set. My dream was within arms reach, and all I had left to do was to get the degree needed for it.
So, I went into communication.
I’m now a communication major at Washington State University Everett. Lost and confused.
I've also just recently started opening myself up to other possible job opportunities. Ones that included fashion, but didn't limit me to just writing for a fashion magazine. With my degree, I could go into pretty much anything. Why limit myself?
I haven’t given up on my dreams necessarily; I’ve just altered them a bit. I’ve allowed myself to have more than just one dream. Maybe I won’t end up at Teen Vogue, writing about spring trends while keeping up with the Kardashians.
Maybe I’ll end up doing something completely unrelated to fashion. Who knows?
I thought I had it all figured out a few times in my life, but plans change. People change.
I have no idea where I’ll end up ten years from now. Will I have landed my dream job(s)? Will I be married with kids?
I’m 19, almost 20. I'm not "grown up yet." I have the whole rest of my life to figure out “what I wanna be.”
So... What do I wanna be when I grow up?
I don't know, and it's okay if you don't either.