I'm in my third year of college. If I'm being legitimately honest here, I'm the pure mix between that's bleeping insane and I'm so ready to get out of here! Anyways, being in my third year of college as an education major means clinical practices pick up heavily. Spending hours in the classroom, teaching lessons, and noting every little move your cooperating teacher makes because you want to be the perfect teacher. While it may appear that we are a mixture of calm, slightly bored, and poised, that is everything but the case. Allow me to enlighten you on the thoughts of the majority of clinical students nowadays.

We are nervous as all get out, for a variety of reasons. For some of us, it's our first heart-stopping slap-in-the-face of what we really got ourselves into. We've heard lecture after lecture about pedagogy, lesson planning, types of instruction, and especially on how to be a functioning teacher. Despite sitting through what feels like a lifetime of lectures, those don't show us how to really teach. We won't really know how to teach until we stand in front of a group of students and learn from them ourselves. The students we have the blessing of teaching are some of our best guinea pigs, and they teach us something new every day, even when you're the observer.

But when you stand in front of your class for the first time and realize you're the commander in chief, it's beautifully exhilarating and horrifyingly nerve-wracking all at the same time. We wonder how the students will react to us if they'll be responsive, and if they're actually comprehending the knowledge we are passing on to them. We're nervous about what our cooperating teachers will think because they've been in our shoes before and can provide critical feedback. We wonder what your students will ask you, communicate with you, and teach you. We wonder if we are giving our future generation the right tools in order to be successful. Sometimes we wonder if we are really in the right profession if we are even meant to be a teacher.

Through all of this, we see miracles. We witness the "light bulb moments" when they get what you're saying. We see the child that's struggling with something get it right in due time, and celebrate their accomplishment with them. We observe their minds at work asking us inquisitive questions. We see their interest when you deliver a new concept. We laugh when students find their quirky way of getting the material, and then we write it down later because it could help tomorrow's child. We watch them grow as individuals, and to be a part of that growth is the indescribable cloud nine feeling only people in the education realm have felt.

This is why I despise the obscure question of, "Why do you want to be a teacher?" There are many reasons to this vaguely specific question. We as clinical students can go into why we think this profession is enjoyable, what teachers have inspired us to choose our major or fundamental values we grew to learn and love. But honestly, it is SO much more than that, and, unfortunately for some, it's almost impossible to explain to someone who hasn't had an experience in the classroom. All I can say is when we step into that classroom and spend time with and teach our kiddos, we may not always walk out with a smile on our face, but we take a deep breath afterward and say to ourselves, "now this is why I want to be a teacher."