Voting is super nifty my friends and I had the chance to do it for the very time time last Friday. It was quite a magical fifteen-minute experience, let me tell ya. Now that I'm a seasoned professional, I think I'm plenty qualified to point out some signs that you're a first time voter.
Here's thirteen.
1.You plan a trip back to your home county.
No place better than home, right? Or maybe you just need your mom as emotional support, I'm not judging.
2. Or maybe you go with all your friends to vote.
Friends who vote together, stay together.
3. People in line tell you that they are "proud of you."
And by "people," I mean elderly women.
4. You think the machine is touch screen.
Honestly it's the twenty first century y'all, step it up.
5. You double check to see if you even selected the right candidate.
Heaven forbid you mess up something you only get to do once every four years the first chance you get.
6. You feel the need to tell the people in line that you are a first timer.
You know, because you want other people to be as excited for you as you are.
7. The "I Voted" sticker is of the utmost importance.
I mean, if you didn't get a sticker, did you really even vote?
8. You take a selfie with said sticker.
I mean, if you didn't take a picture with your sticker, did you really even get one?
9. You post said selfie with said sticker on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.
I mean, if other people don't know that you got a sticker, did you really even vote?
10. People in your polling location ring a bell and shout "first timer," prompting cheers from the other voters.
This might just be a Travis county thing, but heck, it was almost more embarrassing than the staff at a restaurant singing you Happy Birthday.
11. You get told "congrats" on the way out.
Thank you, kind strangers!
12. Your mom cries while watching in the distance. Might even call you her "little citizen."
She says she just has allergies but you know dang well she's thinking about how old she is.
13. You feel like the most responsiblist adult on the face of the earth.
Bring on car insurance payments! Rent! Credit card debt! Depends! Prunes! Cialis!
Confused by this list? Haven't voted yet? Early voting doesn't end until this Friday so go out there and make your voice heard! I love you nasty people.
