I love getting my nails done, but what I don't love is the awkward silence. I never know what to talk about when my nails are getting pampered. Do I ask them how their day is? Or is that too personal? Do I talk about myself? No, that seems too boastful. I always end up feeling bad or even rude if I don't speak much during my nail appointment. To prevent others from feeling this way, I've compiled some ideas for people to discuss when getting their nails done.
If you're a person who has no problem talking during their manis and pedis, disregard this article because you, my friend, are a shining star.
1. You could talk about Gila Monsters.
Have you ever heard of this reptile? Neither had I until recently. These creatures deserve to be recognized so speaking about them during your nail appointment is the perfect way to spread the word. Gila Monsters are venomous lizards who spend most of their time hidden in the ground. They reside in Northern Mexico and the Southern region of the United States. Be sure to mention how these little guys only eat 5-10 times per year which means they're lean and venomous machines.
2. You could also discuss how to make the greatest mac and cheese.
God bless whoever created mac n' cheese. Discuss with your nail technician about how to make this glorious type of food. Do you make it homemade? Or do you buy the cheapest brand at the supermarket and pray it's edible? How about boiling those noodles? And don't forget about the cheese -- do either of you add extra cheesy for cheesy goodness? These are the burning questions that should be discussed.
3. Have either of you been taught how to Dougie?
Remember the 2010 song "Teach Me How To Dougie" by Cali Swag District? Well, did either of you learn how to master the so called "Dougie?" If the answer is no, perhaps you could both practice the moves when you nails are drying. Or if you're feeling extremely ambitious, you could begin to sing the song, possibly harmonize and get the whole nail salon to sing along.
4. Do you think Leonardo Dicaprio deserves an Oscar?
Yes, he does. Really you should just discuss the reason why he deserves an Oscar. Leonardo is an extremely talented man who is also gorgeous, funny, smart, caring, and just all around amazing. If you nail technician does not believe he deserves an Oscar for his new movie, "The Revenant," then you need to argue like it's hot. That man ate real bison organs for that movie. He was devoted. He deserves all the happiness in the world.
5. Tell them your life story.
Tell them about how you were in your mother's stomach and now you're there with them. You've come a long way since birth.
6. And finally, is Donald Trump's hair full of secrets?
Honestly though, what is that hair made of?! Is it fine wool imported from Turkey? Is it a wig? Or is it a dustball that he found underneath his bed and proceeded to color it? Maybe it's the hairy part of corn or even a croissant. Who knows?
