According to many, 2017 was supposed to be a good year. At first, I could definitely attest to that. Though over the last few months, after a turn of events, I began to look back at all the things I have done and been through over these past twelve years. I experienced times of love, happiness, strength, depression, sorrow and so much more.
Within my exploration, I started to think: what if I had the opportunity to sit down with my 10-year-old self? What would I say? What would I tell her to prepare for everything she was about to face? I pulled out a piece of paper, and began to write. I wrote a letter that in reality will never be received, but to be sent through time. Sent to the awkward, full-faced little girl I was at the ripe age of ten (aka the girl pictured below).
Hi,
I know you are absolutely convinced you have no idea who I am, but you have to believe me on this one, I am you... from the future. Crazy, right?! Anyways, I am writing this to tell you a little bit about what your future looks like for the next 12 years of your life. I will tell you right now, it is going to be a real test of your strength, but I want to assure you that you are going to be fine. You will become one of the strongest young women your friends and family will know.
Secondly, I want you to know that things are rough now, but they will get better. You are different. I know the other kids at school have much difficulty understanding you and who you truly are, but trust me, by senior year of high school they will think you and your gifts are the coolest things since sliced bread. You will also no longer be harassed because you’re weird, or because of your looks. Not to be conceded, but I mean, look at yourself, you look awesome! You will come around the summer after eighth grade, I promise.
Next, I will tell you right now that you are going to get your heart broken... multiple times. You will face rejection, be cheated out and cheated on, and almost marry your high school sweetheart. Unfortunately, your wedding with that former fiance won’t happen, because this crazy thing happens where two people grow apart. Sometimes, during that growth process, you get to the point where you no longer know each other. You are just simply no longer compatible. This will be a true test of your strength. You will find yourself during this process and you will not only grow as a person, but experience a much more powerful form of love: self-love. Not only will this benefit you, but this is going to help with your future relationships, even with the man you will someday marry.
At the age of 19, you will also experience a questioning of your spirituality. This part of your life will be easier than others, but this will still take a toll on you. During this time in your life, you will consider yourself Wiccan, but at 22, you will find a belief much greater, and this will bring you so much love and happiness. The emptiness you also felt during the ages of 19-21 will also be filled with the grace of God and this beautiful newfound faith.
Lastly, not only will you grow as a writer, but you will grow as a creator, baker, singer, lover, daughter, friend, and even a poet! These next twelve years may seem like an uphill battle, but this is what will create the wondrous woman you are today, (pictured below).
Much love,
Your Future Self
