The 5 Worst Books Ever Written

Many believe that any fame, good or bad, is positive. That's a lie. In the world of books where fame and recognition is for better or for worse in the most popular series, there are indeed many literary gems. However, for as many gems as there are, there are an equal amount of rocks. Some books inspire people, other books make you want to die. Here's a list of some of the worst books I could find. I've included links to the Amazon pages on the off chance you actually want to buy these books.

1. "Twilight" series (2007) by Stephanie Meyer

"Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love."

“You are making me insane, Bella."

The brood mother of all teen vampire books and movies, "Twilight's" success in the mid-2000s generated several movies and spin-offs, and the ire of readers everywhere. Stephanie Meyer's foray into the genre generated equal amounts of hatred and love for her story of a pedophile vampire who fought with a shirtless wolfman over Kristen Stewart. Psychology Today even ran an article talking about the potentially damaging lessons "Twilight" taught about relationships warning young readers. "Twilight" has become for a great deal of people, that one summer you accidentally killed a homeless man. You know it happened, but you hope if you don't talk about it for long enough everyone will forget.


2. "Atlanta Nights" (2005) by Travis Tea

“Mmm-hmm. Come and get this big Afros and indescribably tender. His hands moved surely. Recover for a mess. She'd have noticed if it had so impetuously across the pelting Georgia Girl Grill."

“His Blackberry was a girl to appreciate the usual number of white, carefully capped teeth. Just remember-- I've got her peerless eyes."

Unlike the above example, "Atlanta Nights" was deliberately designed to be a bad book. Published by several authors under the name Travis Tea, the book was designed to be as terrible as possible to test the publishing company PublishAmerica for vanity publishing, essentially publishing books without reviewing them. They released this awful work of fiction and surprisingly, the company approved to publish the book. The story's plot is nonsensical with characters and events changing in every single chapter. "Atlanta Nights" is written incredibly badly, with some creative writing courses using the book as a guideline for how not to write. The above quotes are from the Chapter 34, which was created by the Bonsai Story Generated which simply rearranges text based on input. The chapter was made completely randomly by a computer and then was published.


3."Fifty Shades Of Grey" (2011) by E.L James

“His voice is warm and husky like dark melted fudge chocolate caramel...or something. “

“Don't you like the butt drawer?"

“He's my very own Christian Grey Popsicle."

In the same vein as "Twilight," "Fifty Shades of Grey" suffers from immense popularity whilst simultaneously being accused of being poorly written. The series covering the relationship between Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey and their sexual exploitation that delved into explicit detail involving bondage and other kinks. Described as “Twilight but with sex," "Fifty Shades of Grey" actually began its life as "Twilight" fanfiction, so the roots of the book were completely screwed from the beginning. The two versions are so similar that E.L. James has attempted to remove the original “Master of the Universe," (what a crappy name) from every web source possible due to it being so close to his actual work.

4. Eye of Argon (1970) by Jim Theis

"Prepare to embrace your creators in the stygian haunts of hell, barbarian", gasped the first soldier.

"Only after you have kissed the fleeting stead of death, wretch!" returned Grignr.

"You make love well wench," admitted Grignr as he reached for the vessel of potent wine his charge had been quaffing."

"The Eye of Argon," released by Theis when he was 16 years old, has the makings of a young, successful first work by an eager and talented author. This is not the case. Often described as the worst fantasy novella ever written, "The Eye of Argon" is difficult to read with a straight face. The original published version was full of typos and reflected Theis's poor understanding of grammar and artistry, as he decided to draw his own awful art for the story.


The author's overtly descriptive means can stretch on for paragraphs with the first one in the book trailing on about a lizard that has nothing to do with the rest of the story. In another part of the book someone is kicked in the testicles for multiple paragraphs. For several years many versions of the novella that were still in circulation had no ending and reproductions can only attempt to recapture just how bad the original actually was. Fortunately, someone had produced a decent recreation, complete with all of the misspellings and drawings.

5. "Moon People" (2000) by Dale Courtney

“This Story Begins on a beautiful sunny day in Daytona Beach Florida with a man by the name of David Brayner. A 45-year old single man that works in the local high school as a science teacher."

“As Dave pulls into Cheral's place, he sees many many of the regular locals parked in the parking lot like normal."

“Braymer did you hear the news? Sure [sic] David replied. “I'm going to hook up my new telescope we will watch it as it gets close. This is a special telescope that can see during the day."

This book is so bad, Huffington Post did an article chronicling just how awful it actually is. You can actually read part of the book on Amazon through the 'look inside' option. I wouldn't recommend it though, as such a literary mess is almost stressful to look through. The book chronicles the journey of David Brayner, a science teacher-turned-astronaut, or something. I'm genuinely uncertain what was going on in the portion of the book I was able to read. I honestly can't say a lot about this one; it's really so terrible that there's not one specific point to begin. In a twist of irony, the reviews for the book are delightfully sarcastic, highlighting the book's many shortcomings.

Note: As an Amazon Associate, Odyssey may earn a portion of qualifying sales.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

Preview These Top Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2020 Picks — From Luxury Purses To Skincare

Currently 3 million people viewing the Stella McCartney purse I absolutely must have.

Online shopping has been a guilty pleasure of ours for years, but now more than ever it's been a shopping lover's outlet for all our home redecorating projects and resort wear we're purchasing for that trip we had to cancel.

One of my favorite places to (virtually) window shop has always been Nordstrom. I admittedly can't afford to go on sprees there often, but I still get a high off of adding things to my cart I know I'll never actually end up buying. But sometimes, that's not enough — that's when I, like the masses of luxury-, beauty-, fashion-, and decor-lovers around the world count the days down to the annual Nordstrom Anniversary Sale.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Things That 'Shameless' Got Wrong About Bipolar Disorder

There is so much more than Ian and Monica lead viewers to believe.

"Shameless" is a hit television series that airs across the world, for my own personal viewing on Netflix. While the show is a major hit, people aren't talking about the issues in the portrayal in the "mental health" category. Ian and Monica are both pretty important characters with bipolar disorder (BD). There are, however, five major flaws with what their bipolar looks like.

Keep Reading... Show less

Dear Grandma,

I wish my words could adequately explain how much I miss seeing your smile and hearing your laugh. You were such a bright ray of sunshine in my life and now that you're gone, I can't help but remember all the times we had together.

Keep Reading... Show less

Rihanna is known for many things: her music, fashion, makeup, and now skincare. As a makeup artist myself, I can confidently say that she rocked the makeup world when she released her makeup line in 2017 and has been influencing the beauty world ever since.

Trying some of her makeup products myself, I know that she doesn't skimp on quality, and even though some of her products may be a little pricey, trust me, you get what you pay for.

Keep Reading... Show less

Friends, no one needs to be reminded that the COVID-19 pandemic rages on in the U.S. Frankly, this is because we have all collectively decided not to do the one simple thing that was asked of us and wear a mask.

I could make this a very boring article, and berate you with facts and statistics and the importance of wearing a mask, but I have opted against that for both of our sakes. Instead, I will attempt to reach you in another way. You might not care about a disapproving look from me, but from Nick Miller? Maybe that will be enough to change your mind.

Keep Reading... Show less

I don't want to point fingers or call anyone out, but it seems as though since the school year came to a close and summer officially started, more and more people began to care less and less about coronavirus (COVID-19).

I understand that eventually you have to get on with your life and cannot live in isolation forever, but people are still dying, cases are still increasing, and COVID is clearly not going anywhere for the time being.

Keep Reading... Show less

Bombshell news coming from Bachelor Nation today, Tayshia Adams is replacing Clare Crawley as the bachelorette!

Rumor has it that Clare found her person early on in the process and did not want to continue with the process of leading other men on throughout the season.

Keep Reading... Show less

- Though as a little girl, I had the silkiest, softest hair that would get compliments everywhere I went, since I turned about thirteen I've since had coarse, dry hair no amount of deep conditioning masks or sulfate-free shampoo could fix.

- I started using the Raincry's Condition Boar Bristle Brush several months ago, and while I noticed that my hair had been softer, silkier, and shinier than it had ever been, I didn't make the connection because I never thought a simple hairbrush could make any difference in my hair texture.

- I will be the first to admit that I thought it was ridiculous to spend nearly a hundred dollars on a hairbrush, but this one eliminates the need for me to use any heat tools or styling products on it.

- I put some oil or a serum in my hair when it's wet, brush my hair with the boar bristle brush once it's dry, and end up with the lowest maintenance, shiniest hair I've had since I was 8 years old.

@raincrybeauty

Keep Reading... Show less

The NBA is back, and for basketball fans, like myself, it has been the BEST news we have heard since COVID-19 shutdown play indefinitely. I mean, come on, we need to see if James Harden can once again perform so well he has back-to-back 50 point games, Kawhi can lead another team to the championship title, and whether Giannis is going to be back-to-back MVP... among like 500 other things running through our heads!

In the midst of all of the amazing statistics and records that these players are breaking, though, we also just love the NBA because well, there are some pretty good looking guys out there. Here are the 19 hottest NBA players (in no particular order) you would totally let slam dunk on you now that the NBA has returned.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments