I have always been the quiet one. Growing up, I always sat in the back of the class and very rarely opened my mouth, as I felt pre-labeled as the “quiet” one. Throughout school and my very small social group, everything seemed to stay the same. I continued to sit in the back of the classroom and even if I had an opinion I didn’t share it. Why? Because I’m shy, I’m quiet, I am scared of what someone might think or say to me. However, as I’ve grown older and have started to find my own voice, I’ve stopped “hiding” in the back and I’ve started to voice my opinions about topics I feel strongly about.
So what has being the quiet one taught me about the real world and being an adult? It’s taught me to be extremely observant. In my opinion, there are two different types of socializers in this world. There are those that lead the group, are very conservationist and are chatty Kathy’s (for lack of a better term) and then there are others. I fall into that “other” group. We are the observers, we don’t say much but we have strong opinions, however we usually keep them to ourselves and save them for better times. It’s not always a bad thing…but it’s not always a good thing either!
As the quiet adult, I’ve stumbled my way through some pretty sticky situations. Haven’t we all, right? However, a sticky situation can become even stickier when you’re quiet. When your boss is yelling in your face and you don’t have the courage to say a single word back when so many are on the tip of your tongue. Or you’re interviewing for a “strong” position and you immediately seem weak due to your soft, subtle voice. These are all things that the quiet ones have to learn the hard way.
Being the quiet one, I’ve found that it is unbelievably easy to get walked all over, pushed aside or ignored. In the workplace, and being an online student, I’ve had my fair share of “we’ll come back to you.” Or a simple ignorance that I have even asked a question or shared my opinion. It’s especially hard when those around you (co-workers, fellow students, superiors, etc.) aren’t quiet adults. It’s almost like they don’t understand why you can’t just speak up and express what you’re really feeling, or ask the question you’ve wanted to ask. This is because they don’t understand. Think about it…we can’t 100 percent relate to something we’ve never experienced, right?
What do I have to say to my fellow quiet ones? Be confident. With confidence comes your voice. Without confidence we’re quiet, like peanut butter and jelly—they go hand-in-hand. Trust me, it’s still something I’m working on too—you’re not alone. You’re never alone! Next time you have an opinion about something, say it! In the end, who are you trying to impress? Yourself! Don’t care about what others have to say about you or what they think about you.
To my fellow quiet ones, you have a voice. If I can find mine, you can find yours!
