The Value Of Acceptance

The Value Of Acceptance

Why we need to let ourselves be OK with not feeling OK all the time.
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Sometimes, life just doesn’t go at all the way we had planned. We switch majors, switch schools, friendships end, relationships end, new friends come, jobs come and go, and we change our dreams and goals. At first, these changes can seem downright horrible for those of us, like myself, who hate change that we have no control over. I like change when I can control it and when I want it. For example, I liked switching my major because I knew it was what I wanted to do with my life. But, I don’t like change when it is something I wasn’t planning on or expecting.

When I discover that what I had wanted for so long is no longer plausible, or that my future might not be exactly the way I had wanted it to be, I tend to react very negatively. I have a hard time accepting that things don’t always go the way I want them to at the moment.

This has been a constant struggle of mine, because it is very difficult for me to find peace and joy in situations that don’t necessarily present themselves the way I was hoping they would. What I have learned though, is that the fact that I struggle with this is perfectly OK.

Accepting the fact that I don’t feel at peace or happy with certain situations has been the first step in actually beginning to feel at peace and happy. It’s weird how that works.

I don’t like feeling sad, I don’t like feeling lost, and I don’t like feeling confused. These statements used to make me feel even more sad, lost, and confused. But, simply accepting the fact that I don’t like feeling those ways has eliminated so much of the anxiety surrounding situations that make me feel sad, lost, or confused. I tend to worry a lot about the fact that I am sad about something, which makes it seem even worse than it actually is. But, realizing that it is OK to feel that way makes my worries lessen, even just a little.

Accepting the situations that we are in leads to so much more peace in our lives, even if we hate our current situations. The heightened anxiety and stress we live through as a result of not acknowledging or being okay with the fact that we don’t like something that is happening to us can be reduced tremendously if only we have the courage and strength to accept that it is our reality, at least for now.

There is so much freedom that comes from the act of simply saying that we don’t like the way things are right now. Accepting that we are sad, hurt, grieving, lonely, confused, or whatever other emotion we may be feeling allows us to take control of the situation, frees us from the worry the unaccepted feelings bring, and empowers us to take back our lives, in pursuit of the amazing adventures and joys that await us.


"God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.


Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.
Amen."









Cover Image Credit: HuffPo

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10 Things I Threw Out AFTER Freshman Year Of College

Guess half the stuff on your packing list doesn't really matter
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I spent the entire summer before my freshman year of college so WORRIED.

I also spent most of my money that summer on miscellaneous dorm stuff. I packed the car when the time finally came to move in, and spent the drive up excited and confused about what the heck was actually going on.

Freshman year came and went, and as I get ready to go back to school in just a few short weeks (!!), I'm starting to realize there's just a whole bunch of crap I just don't need.

After freshman year, I threw out:

1. Half my wardrobe.

I don't really know what I was thinking of owning 13 sweaters and 25 T-shirts in the first place. I wear the same five T-shirts until I magically find a new one that I probably got for free, and I put on jeans maybe four times. One pair is enough.

2. Half my makeup.

Following in the theme of #1, if I put on makeup, it's the same eyeliner-mascara combination as always. Sometimes I spice it up and add lipstick or eyeshadow.

3. My vacuum.

https://secure.img1-ag.wfcdn.com/im/d5ea3c03/resize-h2000-p1-w2000%5Ecompr-r85/3021/30217778/Express+6+Volt+Cordless+Bagless+Handheld+Vacuum.jpg

One, I basically never did it. Two, if I REALLY needed to vacuum, dorms rent out cleaning supplies.

4. Most of my photos from high school.

I didn't throw them ALL away, but most of them won't be making a return to college. Things change, people change, your friends change. And that's okay.

5. Excess school supplies.

Binders are heavy and I am lazy. I surprisingly didn't lose that many pens, so I don't need the fifty pack anymore. I could probably do without the crayons.

6. Cups/Plates/Bowls/Silverware.

Again, I am lazy. I cannot be bothered to wash dishes that often. I'll stick to water bottles and maybe one coffee cup. Paper plates/bowls can always be bought, and plastic silverware can always be stolen from different places on campus.

7. Books.

I love to read, but I really don't understand why I thought I'd have the time to actually do it. I think I read one book all year, and that's just a maybe.

8. A sewing kit.

I don't even know how to sew.

9. Excessive decorations.

It's nice to make your space feel a little more cozy, but not every inch of the wall needs to be covered.

10. Throw pillows.

At night, these cute little pillows just got tossed to the floor, and they'd sit there for days if I didn't make my bed.

Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

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Calling People Hateful Is Not A Productive Dialogue

Universities have become a breeding ground for intolerance.

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The political climate is rough. I don't enjoy commenting on it because of how controversial it has become. Every once in a while, however, I come across something that rubs me the wrong way.

As I was walking through campus the other day, chalked on the side of a cement wall was a phrase claiming the College Republican club on campus was a hate group. I don't know anything about the person who wrote this statement or anything about the College Republican group on campus, but I do know one thing: this statement is false.

Universities have become a breeding ground for intolerance.

Just because someone has a different opinion from you doesn't mean they are hateful. There is room for disagreement.

A psychology professor of mine once said something that impacted my perspective toward both political parties: "Both sides think they're right, but both sides can't be right." Both sides make decisions based on what they think is right. A person's opinion is not "wrong" if it differs from yours. It's just different.

It's important to recognize that people won't always agree with you, and that's okay. That doesn't give you the right to call them mean or hateful. It allows an entrance into discussion. Besides, if you want to persuade someone that your belief is more accurate, name calling won't get you anywhere. It will only cause the other person to view you as inconsiderate and unwilling to understand.

How can you convince someone to believe you when you won't listen to their perspective? How can you expect people to listen to you when you won't do the same in return? Not only is it important to recognize a person's beliefs, it's important to understand why they believe what they do.

In order for people to engage in productive dialogue, both sides need to listen to each other and respect each other. Tossing labels around progresses nowhere and doesn't benefit anyone.

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