Driving isn't always an easy task. More often than not, it's a seriously aggravating activity that most would rather sit out of. Driving in Massachusetts may at first seem not much different than driving anywhere else, but people forget Massachusetts residents are called "Massholes" for a reason.
When driving in the state of Massachusetts, there are some things you need to know to avoid awful accidents, intense road rage, and most importantly, to keep the flow of traffic moving safely and efficiently. To reduce your chances of ticking off the locals, here are the unwritten "rules" of driving in Massachusetts:
1. Tourists are NOT allowed to use the back roads.
There's enough traffic everywhere as it is. We don't need people from different states stealing our shortcuts home from work. I'm sorry, but you're on vacation. You signed up for the traffic, we deal with it every season. Go back to the main roads where you belong.
2. You don't need to slow down to 5mph at every single yield or before every turn.
You know how frustrating it is to be late for work and have a car in front of you slow down to an ungodly speed to pull into Dunkin' Donuts? Locals are busy. We don't have time to wait for you to take your sweet time when there's so much we have to get done. As for yields, they're called YIELD signs, meaning you slow down a little and if the road is all clear, GO.
3."Use ya blinkah!"
The popular Boston accented phrase is one of my favorites because let's be real here, I can't read your mind. How am I supposed to know where you're going if you don't signal it? Don't just slip and slide all around the road like it's yours. You're not a stealthy assassin, signal to those around you where you're going to avoid accidents.
4.The left-most lane is the FAST lane.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The law says it's the passing lane, but who really follows that law here? It's an inefficient law to begin with. Imagine if everyone followed it. You'd have an entire row of cars driving the same speed in a single file line or the exact opposite, people criss-crossing back and forth in a chaotic constant stampede. Instead, the fast lane works way better. If you're going less than 70mph in the fast lane, you're going too slow and you need to move over. The right lane is for the speed limit and below. Us faster drivers like to get where we're going quicker and feel more comfortable at higher speeds, so move it. This way, slower drivers can move at the same speed as each other and pass in the left lane as needed, and faster drivers can speed down the road as long as they need.
5.You need to YIELD to the cars already in the rotary and once you're in, NEVER yield to cars trying to get in!
The right of way is a big deal in Massachusetts, and the rotary is a complex place. You don't want to mess things up, so just follow the rules. Those in the roundabout have the right of way. They do not yield to cars outside of it. It is severely dangerous to do so. When trying to get in, wait for an opening in the roundabout and then you may proceed. Otherwise, you must wait. You should NEVER have to stop or slow down in the rotary for someone speeding into it from another road.
6. If someone is trying to pass you, don't you dare touch that accelerator.
That's a sure way to tick off drivers around you and although I'm not familiar with the law, it could arguably be considered attempting drag racing or you can be called out for road rage if you get in trouble for it. Let drivers pass, don't be a jerk.
7. Lane markers are there for a reason. You don't own the road. Pick a lane.
Keeping your car steady in high winds and in other situations is understandable, but if you're just cruising in the middle of the road when there are two lanes available because you simply don't care, you're going to get a couple of cars speeding passed you with their fists up.
8. If I flash my lights from BEHIND you, move. If I flash my lights ONCE coming towards you, turn on your headlights. If I flash my lights TWICE coming towards you, beware of the 5-0.
This might be confusing to some, but usually it's just a friendly gesture/a way of communicating to drivers around you. Lights are important to pay attention to. When it is really cloudy, foggy, and after sunset, headlights need to be flipped on. It's really hard to see cars around you if it's darker out or if visibility is lowered by other means. Whether you see any better with them or not, turn them on to avoid accidents. If I flick my lights from behind you, I may or may not be passive aggressive towards you, but regardless, you're driving too slow and you either need to switch lanes, pull over, or speed up, especially if you're already driving under the speed limit.
9. USE acceleration lanes! Don't sit at the stop sign for an hour waiting for a clear moment.
No one wants to wait in a long line behind you. Acceleration lanes are your friends. Use them to get traffic flowing.
10. When the light turns green… GO!
There's nothing more that I hate than just sitting at a green light. There's places to be, people to see. Move it or lose it, pal. Green means GO!
11. Your brake is NOT your friend. Stop stomping on it for every little pebble that rolls under your tires.
No one likes the people that drive by brake. You know a great way to slow down? Stop touching the accelerator. Only brake when you need to slow down significantly or completely stop.
12. First to come, first to go.
When at an intersection, whoever's there first gets to continue first. If car A stops at a stop sign and then car B stops at the stop sign next to it, car A goes first. That's it. Don't take someone's right of way away from them or they're going to be steaming.
13. Shut your high beams off when someone is right in front of you or coming towards you on the opposite side of the road.
It's super hard to see when bright lights are shining in your eyes or in your rearview mirrors. Some high beams can be practically blinding at times. As a respectful and general rule of thumb, turn them off when approaching another vehicle.
14.Turn right on red, PLEASE.
In Massachusetts, turning right on red is completely legal as long as "no right on red" is not posted at the intersection. Please don't make people wait behind you for no reason!
15. If you're not going 10mph over the speed limit, you're not going fast enough and your subject to tailgating.
Obviously, speeding is a bad thing and against the law, but at the same time, some speed limits are just too low. Massachusetts is a speedy state. Fit in or get out. Otherwise, people are going to ride your butt and you're just going to have to deal with it.
Massachusetts is a tough place to drive, but if you follow the above "advice" from just your average "Masshole," you should be fine. Thank you for reading my article!
