"There are days when I wake up and don't know what I'm doing here. I barely recognize the pair of eyes staring back at me in the mirror..."

"Sometimes the Devil sounds a lot like Jesus, telling me I'm not enough..."

"Leave all of your troubles, leave all of your sorrows, set down your burdens, come on and follow..."

--Ben Rector

Being born into a Catholic family, I was baptized, received the sacraments of Reconciliation, First Communion and Confirmation, but even participating in these Holy acts are not what strengthened my relationship with God. Sure, it allowed me to learn more about my faith and God, Himself, but I didn't necessarily learn how to be a faith-filled person. It wasn't until I began to lose my faith in God that I learned His true power.

There are two things my mom says you should never bring up in conversation: politics and religion. Well, by the title of this article I think you all know that I'm not going to talk about politics, but I believe that I'm not the only one who lives with this struggle. Temptation surrounds us everyday, especially in college when we are given so much freedom and become increasingly independent. True character, although, is not what you do when everyone is watching, it's what you do when no one is watching.

Homework, activities, social life, and more homework. Our lives are incredibly busy and they only get busier and busier the older we get. Prayer becomes an afterthought, "Oh, I'll pray before I go to bed!" I tell myself that almost every night and well, what do ya know?, sleep deprivation wins the moment my head hits the pillow. I know God doesn't count the number of times we go to church or the amount of prayers we pray, but still I feel bad that I go days without talking to Him or thinking of Him.

Those days sometimes turn into weeks, and I still haven't gone to church on Sunday in a long time, too long. How do you find a healthy balance? I'm still trying to figure it out, but I know that I am doing a lot better this year. I make a point each day to at least say, "Hey Father God! Thanks for another great day." It's not a long conversation, but it's a conversation nonetheless.

Going into college, I thought because it was religiously affiliated, I would only grow closer to God than I already was from my high school experience. I was wrong, any relationship you have requires effort. Freshman year I was too caught up in the many new friends I was making, the increasing amount of homework, and frankly how busy I had become in general to make my faith a priority like I used to.

What I find most saddening about that experience is the fact that it was at this time I needed Him the most, and I had let life get the best of me. I was thousands of miles away from home, sick with a cold that turned into strep, a sinus infection, pink eye AND a double ear infection all at the same time (I know, I hit the jackpot). To top it all off though, I had never felt more alone at my new home. Honestly, I don't blame my friends for thinking I was a walking plague, because I basically was. I got so used to having a fever I couldn't remember what it felt like to feel physically healthy.

I wish it wasn't like this, but it's usually at our weakest we turn to our faith for help. I remember laying in bed, repeatedly praying, "Help me Jesus. Help me Jesus. Help me Jesus," until I finally fell asleep. No, I wasn't on my death bed and I knew I was eventually going to get better (two months later), but when you feel as though you don't have anyone, that's when you remember He is always there.

Faith, again, is a topic that most try to avoid; however, it is a major component that of our personal and cultural identities. I couldn't walk up to a stranger and tell you how faith-filled that person is, but I think it would surprise most of us to find out exactly how faith-filled some of us actually are. For all that we are given, giving thanks for how blessed you are is a habit that we all could practice more, myself included.

If it takes five minutes to walk to class in the morning, spend three of those minutes with God. Who knows, maybe that could become part of your morning routine. God understands that we're really busy, He created us, therefore He already knew how involved we were going to become. Despite all of that, however, He never loves us any more or any less than He always has and always will. Just knowing that in your heart is more than enough. Sometimes the hardest part of this struggle is just remembering He knows what's in your heart, even if you don't tell Him. He is always with you.

I don't think this struggle will get any easier, it'll just change in accordance with the changing of our surroundings and situations. We'll have to adjust, but that's why He created us in the first place. To survive and thrive. With all that being said, I feel like there is only one thing left to say:

Hey, Father God,

You rock, thank you so much, and I love you.

Amen.