I have worked in the restaurant industry since I was 16. I started out as a busser/hostess, and when I turned 20 I was trained as a waitress. Let me tell y'all, I was so excited to be a server. First of all, I was broke after having been on a year-long hiatus from working at a restaurant because I went away to school. Second, since I have been at the same restaurant this whole time, this was something along the lines of a rite of passage for me to graduate to more responsibility. Finally, I was dying to get that short black apron tied around my waist to prove that I got this.
Fast-forward to three years later, and I realized I was way too excited for something that can be straight up hell. I thought that becoming a server meant customers saw me as a human and treated me as a human should be treated (naturally). I mean, I was prepared for the occasional customer who I just wouldn't be able to please, but lately, I feel as though my coworkers and I have found ourselves in a thankless job. Often, I've found myself making mental lists of things I wish my customers understood so that I could give them the best service possible. Here's that list.
1. Please, please, please put your phone away when I'm trying to get your order.
No, I'm not trying to ruin your life. I'm just trying to get your order. Also, the longer you take telling me what you want, the longer you wait for your food - remember that.
2. Help me help you by handing me your cup when I come to your table with a refill.
Otherwise, it's equally as embarrassing for me when I spill your drink while I'm trying to reach across your three friends to give you your refill.
3. Use your manners.
For the love of God, basic restaurant etiquette is all I want sometimes. I promise you, I will do my best to get you everything you need, but adding a "please" or "thank you" to your requests makes you seem a lot less demanding. And it usually guarantees a super nice server.
4. Treat me like I'm human.
I know that I'm your server and you came to my restaurant to be served, but I am not your servant. I'm human, and I have very real feelings. Also, why would you hurt the feelings of someone who is in control of your food and drinks? That just doesn't make any sense to me.
5. I beg of you, respect the restaurant's policies.
I am just a server. I repeat, I am just a server. So no, I don't have control over the air, food portions, or prices. Complaining to me that we have to charge extra for salad if you don't order a meal or the rise in prices doesn't change anything except my attitude (which, by the way, I am doing my absolute best to control.)
6. Finally - and most importantly - Smile.
Genuinely, most days all I need is a smile from my tables to help me get through my shift. I spend most of my day (or night) in that dark hole, and some days it can get really really rough to just be there. I've realized, though, that my moods are instantly lifted and work is a lot more bearable when I get a smile or two from my tables. And usually, even regardless of how much money I'm leaving with that night, it's pretty great for making the rest of my night better.
I can imagine most of these can apply to pretty much any job out there in the right context. These are six things customers can do to allow me to do my job to the best of my ability. I just want to be treated like a person so I can actually feel like a person, and when you think about it, just giving a little smile can be all someone needs to get through the rest of their shift without having a complete mental breakdown.
