I love watching movies, I want to be in the movie theatre watching the new Bollywood or cuddling up on my sofa and finding one on netflix. But rewatching one of my favorites from my childhood just hits different. It wierd what I feel watching it because it reminds me of what I was like bakc then and I can rememeber the exact setting of when I first watched the movie. And life is aight now but its not the same as being this chubby little 12 year old sitting in the living room claiming that her life was going to be exactly liek that of the characters in Student of the Year when she goes to college.
Now sitting here, in my college dorm room, watching the movie again just feels wierd. Not in a bad way neccesarrily but the stress of college really makes me miss being young and hopeful. Like right now, I haven't done any studying this weekend and its Sunday night, almost 9 pm. And I have the stress of organic chemistry and biology in the back of my head and I just got throguh a brutal week of midterms and I'm constantly questioning my abilities and intelligence and I remember being so content when I first watched this movie. It was a late weekend night when I first watched it and I was in 7th grade so I didn't have any homework to do and my mom was sitting next to me and we were eatin watermelon. It was the best time.
I also watched the movie without constantly comparing myself to the characters. But now that I am roughlt the same age as them, wathcing this movie makes me hate my body even more, it makes me hate the fact that I just ate like a pound of pasta and can't wear the cute little dresses everyone in the movie is wearing. And literally what hurts the most is that I feel like no one will ever love me as much as the people on the screen love each other. Its stupid because I know fi just a movei but its still annoying you know?
I wanted the rant in this articel because I know many people can relate to me and its nice to know there are others just like you out there.
