Memo From 1 Demon to Another
Start writing a post
Entertainment

Memo From 1 Demon to Another

A satire about Hell, artists, and churches

84
Memo From 1 Demon to Another
Gabriel Santiago

To: Utter Discontent, Regional Manager for Church Manipulation Services (N. America)

From: Discord N. Malice, VP for 8th Circle of Hell (Global Initiative branch)

Subject: New Developments, Artist Project

Date: March 24, 2016

My associates and I are very pleased with your progress on the Art Project. I spoke with the CEO yesterday, and he informed me he was especially glad to see Despair’s recent reports. Thanks to your efforts, churches across the North American continent are firmly convinced artistic talent has no place in serving their master. Your results convincing the Protestant branches to misapply their Master’s commands on the subjects of evil, sacred as opposed to secular work, and the supposed “final battle” have been particularly good.

However, you no doubt remember the primary purpose of the Art Project goes beyond convincing churches to ignore or mistreat artists. Successful as your efforts have been, the CEO and I agree that it’s time to implement Phase 2. This next phase will involve targeting both the established market and our new targets – the artists themselves. You’ve created the ideal atmosphere for artists to hate and reject churches; moving forward, we must enable them to act on this motivation.

This process will involve some added responsibilities, giving you the opportunity to show your management skills in new areas. Extra staff to help with these new responsibilities will arrive in two weeks – including Indignation, whom you remember from the Washington Project. He’s been following your progress from the start and seems excited to work with you again.

New materials for Phase 2 should arrive at your office soon, you’ll find that most of it is simply an extension of principles and ideas from Phase 1. I particularly recommend the CEO’s latest book, “6 Ways to Make Christians Give Up On Church,” and Indignation’s new pamphlet “Turning Righteous Anger into Bitterness and Pride.” We will also slowly reduce the amount of Phase 1 material we send, so storage space should not be a problem.

If you have any other concerns about this transition, feel free to reach me by the usual methods. I should get back to you within 24 hours at the latest.

Infernal Regards,

Discord

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

To The Boy Who Changed Me

Just another open letter from a crazy ex-girlfriend.

645
http://cdn1.theodysseyonline.com/files/2015/10/09/635800144722553570-908383045_993037_10201471592537019_550485816_n.jpg

You’re probably thinking, “oh sh*t, my ex is writing a hate letter and a tell-all about our roller coaster tycoon relationship with terrible fallout.” But if you’re thinking that, oh honey you’re wrong. This isn’t some sappy pity party nonsense and it’s not a trash-my-ex tell all; it’s a journey. And it’s my side of our story to tell…

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Dear College Students, Are You Undecided?

The Girlfriend's Guide to College

3507
Dear College Students, Are You Undecided?
https://pixabay.com/photos/college-students-diploma-graduate-3990783/

Up until last week, I always had a major. I was an international business major, finance major, psych major on the pre-medicine track… and now (finally) I am exactly where I should have been when I started college: undecided. I think there is too much pressure as a high school student to have a designated path about what you want to study, be when you 'grow up' and essentially spend the rest of your life doing. As an 18-year-old, I really feel like I tried to pin myself down to a major so that I had a set path to follow and something to look towards. This is probably very conventional and I know tons of people at school who have their minds made up about what they want to study.

Keep Reading... Show less
Adulting

Life Is Messy

Finding who you are in your 20s

3522
Life Is Messy
https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-photography-of-yellow-sunflower-field-under-sunny-sky-1169084/

I am 25 years old and just now learning who I am. When I separated from my husband I was terrified of what would follow. I did not know who I was outside of a relationship, nor did I know how to be on my own. It was scary, and I was so lost. I spent months discovering who I was, and what I wanted to be. I am still searching as I believe we never truly know who we are even when we "grow up". I came to the realization that I had been hiding a part of myself for my entire life. Coming out was not easy, growing up in the church made it scary, and hard. I was told growing up that being anything but straight was such a sin, and that i would spent my life in hell because of it. I came out to my parents when I was 25 years old. I picked up the phone and called my mom, and uttered the words "I'm queer" through tears. I knew my parents would be supportive, but that didn't make it any easier for me to vulnerable and raw. Since then, I have slowly started being more authentic in who I am, and not hide parts of me just because of people's shitty opinions.

Keep Reading... Show less
Adulting

Ask Your BFF These 20 Questions To See If They Know You As Well As You THINK That They Do

Ask your best friend these basic questions to see just how well they know you.

41838
Ask Your BFF These 20 Questions To See If They Know You As Well As You THINK That They Do

My best friend has been in my life since we were 3 years old, now that we are adults now, I'd like to ask her these questions to see how well she knows me.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Alone At The Met

I survive a day alone in NYC.

11382
Wikimedia Commons

It was six in the evening. I was sitting in the courtyard of a Renaissance-era Italian villa, glancing around at the statues, most notably one of a boy removing a thorn from his foot. Despite the supposedly relaxing setting, I was incredibly anxious. My phone was at less than 5 percent battery, and once it died I would be completely disconnected from my family and peers, alone in one of the largest art museums in the country.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments