In tenth grade I met one of the greatest teachers I’ve ever had the privilege of learning from. She was the first person I felt cared that we actually learned something; that we wouldn’t just pass a test, that we’d use it later in our lives. Throughout my life I’ve had the privilege of finding more teachers like her. But I remember distinctly one of her greatest lessons to us came in a green Post-it note. It was a simple idea, but it was something we hadn’t been hardened on. My classmates and I got away with a lot of things. She was the first person to make me feel responsible for what I did as an individual. The green Post-it note was a reminder. Whenever we left our books in our lockers and didn’t bring them, we would have to come up to her desk, write down what we left or didn’t do for that class date, and sign it. The purpose was to help us remember the green Post-it before we headed to the class, allowing us to be more careful, more prepared. These are the green Post-it notes I’ve remembered before I make any decision in my life.
1. You can’t change people, so stop trying to.
No matter how hard you love a person they are the only ones capable of changing themselves. Even if it’s for the best reasons, change is only capable of happening when that person is ready to accept that they need to change in the first place. To fix a problem, you must first recognize there is one. It’s not your fault that ignorance is bliss.
2. Never excuse your work.
A friend of mine passed down this knowledge from another amazing teacher. Don’t ever excuse your work. Don’t feel ashamed of it. As long as you’re not a racist, homophobic, misogynistic prick then your good. Anything you make is yours and what is yours is worthy of existing. It may not be the best, never let your pride get in the way. We all suck sometimes. Don’t hate the things you tried hard to make. There will ALWAYS be people that don’t like your work, some might even hate it, but that’s regardless of the point. Some will love it. And that’s worth it.
3. Don’t ask questions you don’t want to know the answer to.
If you’re not ready to face the truth then don’t ask about it. It is nobody else’s problem but your own if you refuse the answer as true. If you really want to know, then please ask; ask as much as you can. If you think the answer might be too overwhelming (or underwhelming) for you then don’t ask. What has been seen cannot be unseen so please, before you start raising hell over an answer, remember that you asked; you wanted to know; now you know.
4. Trust is not the same thing as an expectation.
Don’t expect anything. Because no one owes you anything. No matter what anyone has done for you or not done for you no one owes you anything. You owe things to yourself. Trust people. Trust means you believe that person will make the right decision, but you accept that everyone has their own choice to make.
5. Fear will always lose if there is hope.
Right now more than ever this is something I need to keep reminding myself of this. The world seems so shaken, so wounded. Everywhere I look there is injustice and it overwhelms me. But I still have hope. I see the people who are trying to fix this broken world and I believe in them. I believe in all of us that look for justice. I believe in all of us that still have hope that one day things will be fair and equal for ALL of us.
So far, these are my green Post-it notes. These are the things I remind myself of every day. They keep me prepared for the future. They make me careful about the decisions I make. I encourage you to keep your own notes, your own memos. Remember the important things you’ve learned, the things that have shaped you and use them as tools in your life. My notes will change, as time is an ongoing presence that you most move with not against. And so will yours.
