To The Girl Who Changed Her Mind

Dear girl who changed her mind,

I want you to know that it is okay that you have changed your mind. You may have already felt guilty or unsure as to why you did. But, regardless of how your friends or family make you feel about changing your mind, if you seek God's approval and guidance, he will lead you and reassure you of what is in his plan for your life. I've changed my mind more times than I can count and I learned the hard way that the choices I made were not in God's will. But, even though I prayed for the Lord's guidance, I knew that I was going to do what I wanted regardless of what God had planned. Hopefully, you will seek God and his plan for your life instead of doing what you want. You're going to come across many people that will tell you that what you feel is wrong and that you are too young to know what you want. You will find yourself humiliated by others because what you want doesn't fit their expectations. But it is okay, you shouldn't feel held up to anyone's expectations except God's.

If you have changed your mind about a relationship, you need to know that it is okay and yes, what you're feeling is okay too. I've been through this situation before, I was in a relationship for close to four and a half years. I was 15 when it started and 19 when it came to a close. That relationship grew and developed through the years like a rose, but every rose has a thorn. I admit, I was the one who changed my mind and for a long time I struggled with the idea that changing my mind was blasphemy. I didn't seek God like I should've. I remember going to church and at the end of the morning service an alter call was given, I knew I had to go to the alter to pray. I didn't have the words to say, but I poured my heart out to God because I knew I didn't have the heart to hurt someone who had shared most of my teenage life with. As I was pouring my heart out during alter call, the one person I didn't want to hurt was right next to me praying with me. We both knew that we were growing in different directions and things were getting harder and we knew we had only one place to go to for answers- Jesus. At the end of this relationship, I was the one who made the final decision and I can't say I listened to what God was telling me, but he did assure me that it is okay to change my mind. Though our relationship came to a close, I do wish nothing but the absolute best for the boy who prayed with me.

Regarding my previous relationship, I did hate myself for changing my mind and I couldn't understand why I hurt like I did after I made my decision. I found myself home alone one day and I remember my knees hitting the ground and how I was telling Jesus all the things I hated about myself for the choices I made. And, you know, I knew that God loved me even though I made a decision without his approval and guidance. But, that day that I was on my knees praying for his comfort and forgiveness, Jesus spoke to me. He reassured me that it was okay to be unsure of things we don't have the answers to.

So I want you to know that Jesus will forgive you for not seeking him first when making a decision. If you're struggling whether it be in a relationship or contemplating dropping out of college, seek God first. Going through a very tough situation and not seeking God first, made things a lot harder for myself than it had to be. But now since I am seeking God and his will, I'm confident that he is going to guide me even if I interfered with his plan. Because of God's comfort and reassurance I am okay because I know that it truly is okay to change my mind. Once you seek God and accept the fact that it is okay to change your mind you will have peace, comfort and joy. Most of all you will be happy.

"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." - Wayne Dyer

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