To The Best Friend I Left Behind

To The Best Friend I Left Behind

I will miss you in the big and little things.
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I’m sorry, but at the same time, I’m not. We both knew I needed to go off on an adventure. What I’m sorry for are all the things I didn’t realize I would miss, or more importantly the things I would need.

I should have realized that late night phone calls would have to take the place of our face to face conversations. We couldn't just pick each other up and head to Starbucks to discuss the details of our lives. Soon all we would have were FaceTime calls and screenshots of texts to discuss. I wasn’t ready to not get your hugs or reassuring looks when I called you crying at night. But what I’m most sorry for is robbing us of some of the best years to make memories. The time we could spend making memories is crushed into the small amounts of time we both have off of school.

I look around my room and see the countless pictures of the two of us. They span from just nights of us at home laughing to SEC football games, and these photos represent something more than just events. They’re the conversations we had, the jokes that were made, and the super uncomfortable memories of random guys trying to dance with us in the middle of Starkville, Mississippi.

Looking back I wish I had made a different decision. Sometimes when I think of all the things that I can’t do with you I wish I had stayed closer to home to go to school. I wish the things we could do together didn’t depend on if I was going to be home when they were going on. I wish that you were the person I had here to talk to when I needed a shoulder to cry on, that you were the one I could call to come and get me when a date goes horribly wrong.

I wish I had been there the nights you needed a friend and didn’t have someone else there to talk to. I wish I didn’t have to watch our friendship struggle because I decided to leave you.

We both know that this was a lesson I had to learn the hard way. Neither of us learns things the easy way. I’m so sorry for missing out on the memories that we could be making right now. And I’m especially sorry for not being there when your life changed drastically.

Honestly, its one of my biggest regrets. I wish in the moment you told me what was going on I could have packed up my car and driven straight to your house to move in. But I couldn’t and I’m so sorry. Because you've been there for me in times that I didn’t deserve to have a friend who would stick by me, and I couldn’t even be there to fight off the long nights and the moments of uncertainty.

I hope that one day I can make up for all the moments I’ve missed. I hope that I haven’t lost too much time with you. I know that life changes and that things will never be the same as our college years, but I pray that when I finally get to come home, our friendship will be that much more precious. It made it through years of being six hundred plus miles apart. I also pray that you cherish every phone call, FaceTime, Snapchat, and Tweet as much as I do.

As dumb as it sounds, this is what our normal day looks like and I don’t want to forget any of it. I may not be able to sit on a couch and eat ice cream with you when we've had a rough week, but I sure as heck can send you a dorky picture when you need a pick-me-up.

I’m sorry that I changed the course of our friendship. You’re one of the most important people to me. You make me smile, but I also know when you tell me something I’m doing needs to change you only have my best interest at heart. When I say I genuinely trust you with my life, I mean every word of it. You are the peas to my carrots and I wouldn’t have anyone else take your place.

Cover Image Credit: Adria Johnson

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To The Nursing Major During The Hardest Week Of The Year

I know that no grade can possibly prove what kind of nurse you will be. I know that no assignment will showcase your compassion. I know that no amount of bad days will ever take away the empathy inside of you that makes you an exceptional nurse.

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To the Nursing Major During Finals Week,

I know you're tired, I know you're stressed, and I know you feel like you can't go on. I know that no part of this seems fair, and I know you are by far the biggest critic of yourself. I know that you've thought about giving up. I know that you feel alone. I know that you wonder why in the world you chose one of the hardest college majors, especially on the days it leaves you feeling empty and broken.

But, I also know that you love nursing school. I know your eyes light up when you're with patients, and I know your heart races when you think of graduation. I know that you love the people that you're in school with, like truly, we're-all-in-this-together, family type of love. I know that you look at the older nurses with admiration, just hoping and praying that you will remain that calm and composed one day. I know that every time someone asks what your college major is that you beam with pride as you tell them it's nursing, and I know that your heart skips a beat knowing that you are making a difference.

I know that no grade can possibly prove what kind of nurse you will be. I know that no assignment will showcase your compassion. I know that a failed class doesn't mean you aren't meant to do this. I know that a 'C' on a test that you studied so. dang. hard. for does not mean that you are not intelligent. I know that no amount of bad days will ever take away the empathy inside of you that makes you an exceptional nurse.

I know that nursing school isn't fair. I know you wish it was easier. I know that some days you can't remember why it's worth it. I know you want to go out and have fun. I know that staying up until 1:00 A.M. doing paperwork, only to have to be up and at clinicals before the sun rises is not fair. I know that studying this much only to be failing the class is hard. I know you wish your friends and family understood. I know that this is difficult.

Nursing school isn't glamorous, with the white lab coat and stethoscope. Nursing school is crying, randomly and a lot. Nursing school is exhaustion. Nursing school is drinking so much coffee that you lose track. Nursing school is being so stressed that you can't eat. Nursing school is four cumulative finals jam-packed into one week that is enough to make you go insane.

But, nursing school is worth it. I know that when these assignments are turned in and finals are over, that you will find the motivation to keep going. I know that one good day of making a difference in a patient's life is worth a hundred bad days of nursing school.

Keep hanging in there, nursing majors. It'll all be worth it— this I know, for sure.

So, if you have a nursing major in your life, hug them and tell them that you're proud of them. Nursing school is tough, nursing school is scary, and nursing school is overwhelming; but a simple 'thank-you' from someone we love is all we need to keep going.

Sincerely,

A third-year nursing student who knows

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To The High School Graduating Seniors

I know you're ready, but be ready.

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Seniors,

I am not going to say anything about senioritis because I was ready to get out of there and I'm sure you are too; however, in your last months living at home you should take advantage of the luxuries you will not have in a college dorm. The part of college seen in movies is great, the rest of it is incredibly inconvenient. It is better to come to terms with this While you still have plenty of time to prepare and enjoy yourself.

Perhaps one of the most annoying examples is the shower. Enjoy your hot, barefoot showers now because soon enough you will have no water pressure and a drain clogged with other people's hair. Enjoy touching your feet to the floor in the shower and the bathroom because though it seems weird, it's a small thing taken away from you in college when you have to wear shoes everywhere.

Enjoy your last summer with your friends. After this summer, any free time you take is a sacrifice. For example, if you want to go home for the summer after your freshman year and be with your friends, you have to sacrifice an internship. If you sacrifice an internship, you risk falling behind on your resume, and so on. I'm not saying you can't do that, but it is not an easy choice anymore.

Get organized. If you're like me you probably got good grades in high school by relying on your own mind. You think I can remember what I have to do for tomorrow. In college, it is much more difficult to live by memory. There are classes that only meet once or twice a week and meeting and appointments in between that are impossible to mentally keep straight. If you do not yet have an organizational system that works for you, get one.

I do not mean to sound pessimistic about school. College is great and you will meet a lot of people and make a lot of memories that will stick with you for most of your life. I'm just saying be ready.

-A freshman drowning in work

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