It's been a while. Honestly, I wasn't sure if I was going to come back to writing. I needed time to reflect and think about why I was doing what I do and who it was for. I want to talk about what brought me there.
Focusing on social justice topics and issues is never easy. You're never going to please everyone and when trying to represent and defend a group you end up leaving (intentionally or unintentionally) someone out. You always have to think about "What can I do better" or "How do I make sure I'm not alienating this person." You also have to make sure you don't come off as just some ranting jerk who just likes to complain but never offers any type of solution. In short, the label was becoming "The Angry Queer." I had to think hard about that. Is it the message I want to send? Is that who I am? The answer was simple: DAMN RIGHT!!!
As an out LGBTQ+ person, I have a lot to be angry about. We all do. Don't get me wrong, we have made strides in the path to equality from hiding in the backs of bars and safe houses for us to be able to express ourselves and live our lives. We're no longer threatened with prosecution and consequences for being true to who we are in most modern nations, but for every step, the path is paved with the blood, tears and broken pieces of those who struggled to get here and we still have so far to go. We still have to explain ourselves to everyone we meet. Coming out never ends. It has become part of the process for introducing ourselves to new people. Routine. Our rights are still a large part of the political debate. Where to shop. Who to love and how far you can go to express that love. Where to go pee. It's enough to royally p*ss anyone off.
I consider myself lucky. I'm a millennial. I grew up in one of the greatest times of change in the whole world (so far). I'm young enough that the name Matthew Shepard was one that I did not hear of until college. I'm also old enough to understand and feel the full impact of events like 9/11, the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell, the 2008 and 2012 elections and the leap into the fight for marriage equality. Yet I also have to sit and wonder if I am witnessing it's peak. That is a scary thought. Where will we be in the next five years. Two years. Next month. (Especially next month.)
It also means coming to terms with my own disillusions. You can't put out a fire with gasoline and you can't break down a wall with a stick. I'm not forgetting my anger, I'm choosing to channel it. I go to my local LGBTQ+ center weekly (SHOUT OUT TO SAGA, TRANSACTION, APP STATE ACES AND THE HENDERSON SPRINGS LGBT CENTER AT APPALACHIAN STATE UNIVERSITY!!!) I try to generate dialogue and listen and learn while I am there. I take time to read and educate myself on the issues in our community everyday. I watch the news (even when it makes me grit my teeth). I watch the presidential debates. I watch the VP debate. And by far the most difficult, I listen to the opposition. I take the chance to teach, heal and educate. I welcome them with open arms while they throw stones. I am solid, strong and unmovable. I am an Angry Queer.
"Never forget who you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you." -Tyrion Lannister.
