The other day, I found out that one of the worst things that could possibly happen, most definitely happened. It was about two in the morning, so I was bound to fall victim to a late night Internet frenzy. I was reading through my email, and I had seen an advertisement for some of my favorite eyeshadow. Of course, I clicked. I began to admire the beautiful pigmentation of the eyeshadow I'm far too broke to afford, and as I was doing so, I decided to open up my account settings to see which rewards I could potentially collect on.
And then I saw it.
"Allison, You're $235 away from keeping platinum status in 2017."
You've. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Me.
I don't have many vices, but Ulta is one of them. For the past three years, I have prided myself in being an Ulta platinum member. This is something that is slightly unsettling for me, as it is one of the few places where I indulge in a consumerist mentality (However, I chalk this up to my tendency to be distracted by literal sparkles and shiny things... it's fine.). But I'm here and proud of my array of liquid lipsticks. So you can imagine my disbelief when I found my platinum membership was at risk.
Frankly, It was really a series of emotions. It felt very much like the 5 stages of grief:
1. Denial
"It's a glitch. There is no way that I, after two years, could possibly be at risk of losing my platinum status. I am a loyal customer. And this just does not happen to loyal customers. Nope, it's wrong. Should I call? Is there a way to track my payment history? This just isn't right."
2. Anger
They want me to spend HOW much per year?! Have I really been spending that much at Ulta?! What am I supposed to do without 3x points deals?! How am I going to go on without platinum perks emails?! This is an inordinate amount of money! How in the world have I been spending this much... how does anyone spend this much at one place in one year?! YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.
3. Bargaining
Okay, so I have $235 to spend before the end of the year to keep my platinum status for next year. If I buy everyone's Christmas gifts here, I might be set. Except, I'm not really sure I know that many people to justify that much money in gifts alone. Maybe I can get my friends to use my platinum account for their purchases? MAYBE I CAN BEG. PLEASE DO NOT LET THIS BE TRUE
4. Depression
Honestly, there's really no point. Why do I even bother? I might as well go back to drugstore makeup so my face can blow up in acne and everyone can hate me till the end of time. My life is ruined. This is it for me.
5. Acceptance
Well it is what it is. It doesn't change the fact that I'm going to Sephora. Just kidding... Black Friday deals.
Consumerism prevails again. All is right with the world. Besides, it's not like there are important things happening in the world right now anyway.
