When I say that this semester emotionally and physically drained me, I am NOT exaggerating at all. I have never felt so exhausted in my life. It wasn't just the type of tired where I could easily sleep it off. The tiredness that I endured felt like it was permanent; it became a part of my personality. On the very rare days that I was well-rested, I felt weird, almost incomplete, because I've become so used to running on such little sleep. But, I'm not here to ramble on and on about how this semester sucked the life out of me. Actually, let me break down for y'all the good that came out of the bad.
One taught me love.
By one, I mean every person that stuck around through all the smiles and struggles. Thank you to my mom for constantly rooting for me even when I want to give it all up. Thank you to my childhood best friends for never forgetting to check up on me. Thank you to my boyfriend for always making time for me and looking after me. I could go on for days thanking everyone. They showed me what unconditional love is. They gave me so much more than I deserved without expecting anything in return. That will always be the most selfless thing anyone can ever do for someone.
One taught me patience.
Things do not just happen overnight or in a snap. You need a combination of working hard and waiting patiently. I couldn't just push for certain things to happen right when I wanted them to happen, and sometimes they do not even go as planned. What I learned is that no matter how hard a situation may get, you just have to remind yourself that it may take some time, but you can't give up no matter what happens.
One taught me pain.
And, I'm referring to my major classes that I took this semester. All the tears I shed could have possibly left me dehydrated or caused intense heartbreak that I could have died from it. It's safe to say that none of these classes cut me any slack. It was one tall mountain to climb and a never-ending cycle of trying to get to the top only to fall about a million times. I mean, it wasn't like I got over every slump that came my way. My classes only got harder as I continued to struggle. Everything piled up in front of me, creating a taller mountain for me to climb. I'd be lying if I didn't admit I did feel so defeated that I no longer wanted to keep going. Academics had caused a high-level of unhappiness and stress for me. It did seem like a hopeless situation at the time, but I think it was a good thing that I went through that.
Now, I'm so amazing.
If you asked me midway into the semester how I felt, I might have told you that I've never felt so useless and discouraged. I might have even said I wish I could forget this semester complete. And, guess what? Now, I'm glad that I went through hell and back. I know that I've become a better version of myself because I got the chance to learn more about myself during all of this. I learned new ways to improve myself as a person and as a student. And for that, I say thank you, next.
