At this point the world must be familiar with "Jane the Virgin." You know, the show about a girl who got artificially inseminated by accident with a rich hotel heir's child, whose sister is involved with a notorious drug lord, who also happens to be her stepmom. OK, OK... This sounds a little dramatic, but it's a play on common telenovela tropes (exaggerated tropes I'd say). And what the hell does USA know about telenovelas? Well, nothing.
In my opinion USA has no understanding of what telenovelas are because if they did we wouldn't have the same damn English soaps which somehow never seem to end. I would actually like someone to explain to me how this is even a thing. "Days of Our Lives," "All My Children" and "General Hospital" -- WTF is that? Who said, hey it's a smart idea to keep only four or five soaps going on for hundreds of years. Get a freaking grip, America, and actually create soaps with an ending!
With the lack of knowledge the U.S. seems to have on telenovelas, how would anyone know if they're actually living one in real life? I mean isn't that what everyone's concern is? Isn't that everyone's desire?
"Jane the Virgin" does a good job of introducing exaggerated novela concepts blended with common English tropes too, but what happens when you're actually living in your own telenovela? Well here are a few things to look out for.
1. Social Class
If it is truly a telenovela then this will be played up a whole lot. In fact it becomes the basic plot of many novelas. The poor girl always falls for the rich guy or in some cases the rich guys son. Honestly it depends on what they're trying to do. If you happen to be in a similar situation watch out you may experience dramatic camera zoom ins and outs. You may also experience a lot of crying and a whole lot of struggle.
2. Housekeeping or hard labor
A continuous theme in Spanish soaps is the maid falling for the boss. It really relays the drama but again we can also tie this in with social class. Falling for the rich guy or the guy who's literally out of your league not because of his beauty but because of his wallet. If you happen to be a hard worker, maybe you've been working almost all your life to make ends meet and you find yourself in love with your boss, you might be in a telenovela. (This relationship of course has strong power dynamics and isn't necessarily healthy).
3. The Rival(s)
It can't be a romance if you don't have a rival. Love triangles have been done over and over again in novelas so move over Twilight. Both protagonists always have someone who's interested in them more often than not it's the guy who happens to be so irresistible and a million women follow him. Occasionally, the female protagonist will have another male or two take interest in her, but of course she continues to love the main guy. If you have a number of rivals when it comes to love then you might be experiencing some common telenovela symptoms.
4. Your Love Turns Against You
If your rival is a good rival they won't hesitate to turn your love against you and like an idiot he'll fall for any lie she/he tells them. Again, this becomes an intense moment in any telenovela as the humiliation, the yelling and human degradation is essential when your love turns against you. Suddenly, you become the reason for everything that has ever gone wrong. If this happens to you you may want to examine your relationship. It maybe abusive and you need to get out of it and your in a telenovela.
5. The Family Hates You
At this point you have already had a few secret rendezvous and on one of those you happen to be spotted by someone's mom, dad, sister, brother, cousin, best friend, who gives a F, someone in the family has spotted. You'd think there'd be no problem but everyone hates you. His mom thinks you are not good enough for her boy, his dad thinks your a insignificant poor girl and his sister thinks you are an ugly stain to the family name. Of course anyone will try to split you apart. His mom may find ways to punish you because again your not of the same social class. If you don't get along with his parents you're probably in a telenovela.
6. You Are Secretly An Heir To A Fortune
Somewhere in he middle of all the crazy mess, someone dies and leaves everything to you because your a decent human being. More often than not this happens to you while you work for a relative for the person you love or you happen to be the long lost child of someone else. Of course this causes the family to hate you even more for taking what they feel belongs to them and you create more drama for yourself. If you suddenly find yourself with a large sum of money you're probably in a novela.
7. You've Been Slapped In the Face
Whether you received one from the love of your life for being an idiot, a rival in love or from someone's mother or even if you have ever given one to claim justice. If you have ever felt the pain of the palm to cheek then you are probably in a telenovela.
8. You Plan To Marry The Wrong Person
Sometimes it happens out of spite to others, because you're trying to move on and you decide the best way to do so is by marrying someone else in order to prove that you don't love that one person anymore. If this at all sounds like you then you're probably in a telenovela.
9. Someone Tries To Kill You
What is a drama without extremes? It is a common fashion for someone to try and kill someone else. Sometimes the rival goes over board to get what they want, other times it's a family member or friend. Either way someone has tried to kill you to gain something and if that is the case you're probably in a telenovela.
10. Love Conquers All
At the end of the day you know your feelings will get you through any situation. The love you have is so strong you have conquered every possible obstacle and now you're married and bam the end. Unless you get left at the alter, kidnapped or killed. If this is your case you are most likely in a telenovela.
If any of these things applied to you, well, I don't have to say it. This isn't an extensive list, but with it you can get the pre-recs out of the way and double check your own life because maybe it's more dramatic and exciting than you once thought and maybe you learned something to day about Telenovelas.
