T-Swift and I have always had a love/hate relationship. I first discovered her music when I was 12, in 7th grade. I heard "Our Song" covered a school talent show and from that moment on, I was sold. I had already written some songs and played a bit of guitar before then, but hers were the first lyrics that I'd ever heard that resonated with me, and that I could relate to, as dumb as that might sound. Somehow her songs fit in with my tragically dramatic middle school life, with my woeful preteen crushes and feelings of not always fitting in.
Since then, she's released albums every two years. Fearless, my sophomore year of high school. Speak Now, my senior year of high school, Red sophomore year of college, and now 1989 during the fall of my senior, and final, year of school.
Some of my most vibrant memories from those years of my life are directly related to Taylor's songs. It's taken me a hell of a long time to admit that though. At first, when she gained popularity, I simply didn't want to share her with the rest of the world, especially the other teenage girls with an affinity for song-writing. I was selfish, I wanted that to be mine. In fact, many of my songs from early high school were so transparently trying to mimic Taylor Swift, it's almost embarrassing. I was a Jersey girl writing like I was driving around in trucks in the deep south with boys who were flannels. Um, no.
The best thing about this semi-pathetic story though, is evolution. I've evolved since then to becoming an honest writer. I don't write songs very often, truth be told, but when I do, it's because they need to be written. They're honest, genuine, and to tell the truth, a little messy. But they're real, and I've never felt a greater sense of accomplishment than finishing a song.
1989 is a prime example of Taylor doing exactly the same. I jumped on the bandwagon with openly disliking her for stupid reasons- because she's portrayed as a serial dater, as a lovesick girl who cares about nothing else, as an anti-feminist. It's true, she's said some things I don't agree with, but looking back, I regret judging her so harshly in recent years.
Taylor wrote the songs on 1989 because she's evolved, and she wanted to prove this to all those who had pigeon-holed her as those terrible things I listed above. She declared that if people didn't like her being herself, that she was then going to become more of herself, and I love that. There's nothing wrong with writing about what you know- and nobody knows heartbreak, confusion, and to put it simply, jerks, better than Taylor Swift.
No, 1989 is not what anyone expected of her latest album- no soulful acoustic guitar, and there might not be any music videos featuring farmlands with this one. But it's her, it's real, and I thank her for releasing this album and reminding me to celebrate change, evolution, and always striving to be truer versions of ourselves.
My personal favorites so far? Wildest Dreams, Blank Space, and Style.
So put on a nice dress, red lipstick, and go stare at some sunsets.
"Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream."
