After hearing the news of the recent school shooting in Florida, I was heartbroken. And looking at the response from the rest of the nations, it felt as if everyone was searching for answers.
The internet became a raging discussion board, with people offering great arguments and speaking truth about the issues seen in this attack. And while each person is completely entitled to their own beliefs, many of these posts were filled with jarringly disrespectful comments about those who didn’t agree with them.
Events of the past two years have become the catalyst for some of the most contentious debates in our nation’s history, and to be completely honest, it’s made our social lives uncomfortable. Our society has turned to a polarizing view on beliefs. Rather than trying to find a compromise, the new standard has become “my way or the highway,” ultimately causing destruction as we expect others to abandon their values. It’s important to realize that we must be tolerant of other people’s values and cultures, recognizing that no one has the right to force their way of life onto anyone else.
I have watched as both sides share their opinions online, liking and sharing the posts that I agree with. But as I scroll through my social media, I find myself becoming unreasonably angry at those who don’t agree with me. Politics, economics, and social issues have become completely off-limit subjects of discussion. Learning that someone is a conservative or a liberal has become almost as much of a turnoff as if someone admitting to liking the Kardashians (something better than that plz).
As a self-proclaimed liberal in Texas, I’ve found that most of the time I’m fighting to defend my opinions with peers, family members, and classmates. And with a new controversy being released from the White House each week, it’s gotten to be an exhausting task. For me, it’s almost easier to simply block out differing opinions than to spend countless hours trying to justify my own opinions to people I know would never listen to me.
It’s taken me weeks to figure out how to write this article. And I’ve come to realize that there’s no perfect way to bridge this split. With this dichotomous political situation, we can easily block out the issues that we don’t want to argue about. And while this may give us a moment of peace, it doesn’t really create any resolution. Instead, it’s time we find a way to better understand one another.
Looking back at my unreasonably long block list on my social media, I realize that I’ve gotten frustrated with those who support things I don’t believe in. Like so many people these days on both sides of the issues, I can’t understand why people would think like that. And, honestly, I’m ashamed for resenting those who think differently than I do. So I’ve started to ask myself, how do I begin to try to understand them?
When I consider my relationships with my more conservative friends, family, and peers, I’ve realized that we have never had problems discussing political and social issues if we respect one another. I know these people, while different than me, are incredible friends. We may not both like the same flavor ice cream or the same types of movies, but that doesn’t mean I don't like them. So in these friendships, I respect the people enough to try to respect their views. The reason that the relationships between people with differing opinions flourish is the result of mutual consideration and respect; Not only do I listen to their opinions, but they listen to mine as well.
I want to make clear that trying to understand to someone is different than wholeheartedly agreeing with them. Forcing opinions leads to arguments and damaged relationships. While debates can be seen as healthy arguments, there is a difference between discussing opinions and being intolerant of others’ values. While I may not agree with all of their arguments, I can try to understand why they have the opinions that they do. And to be honest, it’s helped me understand my own values even more.
I’m starting to realize that I am not at “war” with people who disagree with me. The feelings of distaste I have for people who don’t agree with me doesn’t come from their personalities or their opinions, it’s the frustration of not being able to fully understand them and why their reasoning is so different than mine. We are all unique and interesting individuals, but through this inability to be flexible or understanding, we distance ourselves from one another.
Next time I’m faced with someone who sees the world differently than I do (which I know will be the next time I look at social media), I want to put aside the idea of being the “winner” or on the “better” side of the issue. I think the idea is that we are all different and that is what ultimately will help us to find the answers to the issues confronting our world; we see the world differently and that's a good thing. We have the ability to work together and combine our knowledge and perspective to work on global solutions. But to make it work, we need to be respectful of others. We shouldn't be shouting (or posting in all caps) our opinions so loudly or so often that we can no longer hear the other people around us. We need to listen to each other, whether in person or on social media, to find common ground and work together to find the answers.
