Moving To New York For The Summer Is The Greatest Risk I've Ever Taken
I have no idea what this summer will bring, but that's okay.
To say I am a planner would be an understatement. I plan to plan, and no, I'm not kidding. When I know I have something coming up, I prepare ahead of time, making sure that everything is set and ready to go. This summer, however, did not go exactly that way. I was supposed to study abroad but needless to say, that didn't happen. Within three days of learning I would be staying stateside over the next few months, I made arrangements to move up to New York for an internship without knowing where I would live or what I would exactly be doing at my internship. I didn't even know the correct start date of my internship. My need for organization took a backseat as I booked a last minute one-way ticket for the Big Apple.
My need for planning and organization took a back seat when I decided to go to the city that never sleeps. I am a creature of comfort, and somehow, I find myself living in a city where I don't know my up from my down. To say staying in this city is nerve-wracking does not even begin to describe the state at which I am in. Despite knowing how to get to and from work, I hardly know my way around.
Starting over in a new city is terrifying. My first night here felt exactly like my first night away at college, lonely and sad. It's not like I know my way around the city, and I am not one to randomly take off and stroll around. Despite knowing a few people around the city, I felt incredibly alone.
Some people thrive off of "newness." They love the feeling of starting over, but to my introverted self, it presents as a challenge. Although the thought of being in a different city and experiencing new things this summer is exhilarating, it is also terrifying. I am currently living on a tiny island crawling with millions of people, but I feel completely isolated. Truthfully, this feeling is entirely self-inflicted. I have to get out of my own head, take a risk, and jump since apparently deciding to go to this city wasn't a big enough risk.
I love where I am working and the people I am working with. Every day brings a new adventure and a different set of challenges. Today I found a new little marketplace and accidentally brought down a section of the produce department. Not my finest or the most coordinated moment but it beats earlier this week when I needed to walk uptown and accidentally walked downtown for five blocks. Slowly, I am learning my way around the city that never sleeps, taking risks and getting out of my shell.
I have no idea what the rest of the summer will hold or what it will look like, but I am excited for all that it will bring and what I will learn.
