GiphyFor real I fit every requirement except maybe to 10 years of experience wanted.
I can also touch my tongue to my nose!
GiphyI'm okay with The Devil Wears Prada lifestyle.
If I have two tasks I need to get done, and a short amount of time to do, I decided on which one to do first by the amount of time it will take. For example, If I have two things due around the same time and I know I can do one of them in a short time frame, I save it for that short time frame. If I have to write a paper and I am finishing it up until class starts, but I have an assignment due later that day, I will do the shorter assignment later. That way I know I have enough time for the longer assignment.
There is a difference between procrastinating because you are in bed watching American Horror Story and procrastinating because you always find yourself too busy to find the time to do anything. If you suffer from the latter, because you work all weekend and have a million and one extra-circular activities to attend too, that's what I call positive procrastinating. Positive procrastination is something you can strive off of, it's really a gift so don't let it get you down. You can do it and really all you need is some last minute time management and you are good to go.
If you have a huge paper coming up and its worth 50% of your grade, write it down in your planner a week ahead of time. That way you convince yourself its due before it really is and you can have time to edit and make it perfect. This will limit the amount of "behind" you are and will allow you to get some task off your to-do list. My tricking your brain into the new date, you'll actually be ahead and allow for more time on other procrastinated assignments. You might still procrastinate up to the fake due date but hey at least you got time.
This is really the story of my life, no matter how hard I try I always end up working on assignments till the last minute. I am frequent flier of the "Printing five minutes before class" plane. A lot of people don't understand why though, It's simple, it's really an adrenaline rush wondering if you are going to make a deadline. It's 11:58 pm and your quiz is due at midnight and you have one question left, boy does that just get you going. I get it. Some people really strive when they wait till the last minute, congratulations that's a life skill that you could probably throw on your resume.
There is a lot of pros of being a professional procrastinator. For example, you are good at multitasking. You can get two tasks (that you forgot to do, of course) done at the same time. You are also a hard worker because you always have to work extra hard to get everything done all on time. There is also the fact that you can handle the pressure well, let's say you really do mess up a deadline in the real world, you have been procrastinating since kindergarten and can handle it like a boss, so it doesn't faze you, and that work project gets you promoted. You're welcome. Not to mention you also feel like a boss when you conquer your forever growing to-do list, and that's really a confidence boost.
Get back to work and just know, procrastination isn't for the faint of heart.
No, I am not going to be a teacher. There are so many other things to do with an English degree that it's almost insulting that you would assume I am going to be a teacher. Now, it is not to say it is shameful to become an English teacher, without them I would not be where I am in my love for literature, however not every English major is going to be a teacher. The two are not synonymous with each other. So next time you run into an English major, instead of saying "Oh, are you going to be a teacher?" try "What are your goals?" or "How interesting, what kind of jobs are you looking at?"
This question is worse than the teacher question simply because the teacher questions at least implies we have the bountiful knowledge, common sense, job opportunities, and the ability to deal with children. The "that" question, as I like to call it, basically tries to erase everything an English major is. The scrutinizer first has this tone of voice that is filled with the utmost disgust. They imply that someone majoring in the field of English has no path in life. They probably assume the English major is well off with money and some "special" art kid who has no brain for such behemoth tasks such as adding numbers. They also act as if that because the English major is not like them, they will eventually fail and end up working in a bookstore for the rest of their life.
This is the most insulting thing I have ever heard in my life. If you're speaking with someone that is talking about their English major and their goals, do not insult them by saying it sounds boring. We get it, every single one of us gets it: you don't like reading and you sucked horribly in English class in high school because you hate reading and don't understand a word Shakespeare says. We know, and we know this because you're not sitting in our English classes with us. We're in our required science class Jeremy, okay, I know you don't like to read. However, at the end of the day, if we're having fun reading Shakespeare and Jane Austen, let us have our fun and don't patronize us with your pitying looks and stories about your mean, high school English teacher. You can't say anything in place of this because even if you say "That's interesting." it comes out condescending and we know you don't mean it. So if you think it's boring, keep it to yourself.
No. English is not an easy major. It may seem like it because, yes, we read a lot. However, contrary to popular belief, we're not just reading. We're reading something that probably dates back to before the modern English tongue, therefore the text, in and of itself, is a challenge. If the text is in modern English then there are at least twenty underlying meanings to everything that happened. We're also analyzing everything the characters do and the writing style of the author. We're analyzing why the author wrote something in a certain metaphor and what that metaphor represents. Then, after all this reading and analyzing we get to compile all of our thoughts into a paper with references to the text and quotes from the text. It sounds easy to may people, but remember that you sucked in high school English. It is so much harder than it looks.
English majors are hardworking, passionate, and knowledgeable humans. Not all of us are overjoyed when we're reading literature from the 1500's. Not all of us are going to be teachers and not all of us are art kids. We all have passions for something that leads us to the English major and we're all very proud of the work we put in to obtain our degree. We all would appreciate it if everyone elsetook a second to know our intentions and respect our decisions.
Seriously Amy, could you get more basic?
You literally graduated a year ago dude, don't act like you know way more than me.
I don't have all day, people. I've got places to go and people to see.
I'm done, Ashley, I've made enough smoothies to feed every vegan on the planet.
I don't care if she's his sister she's getting in my way!
Excuse me sweetie, you should maybe fix your own style before you try to fix mine.
I am completely unqualified, but if you don't give me this job I will resent you for the rest of my life.
He doesn't need an intelligent answer, he's a 20 year old college guy for Christ's sake.
Naive little ones, if only they knew what it was really like here.
Too many regrets to count, unfortunately.
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