“What are you doing this summer?”
If I had a penny for every time I’ve heard that question asked in the past month, I wouldn’t have to worry about the latest spike in tuition. In the past, that question gave me the opportunity to (humbly) brag about my upcoming summer adventures. As a missionary and avid world traveler, my last five summers were spent in countries far away from here.
But not this summer.
This summer I’m not going anywhere. I don’t have a job or any sort of concrete plans. Right now, this summer is shaping up to be one giant foreboding question mark. By now I’ve basically perfected the casual shoulder shrug and mumbled “I dunno” when people ask me what I’m going to be doing. (Almost the same as the “what do you want to do when you graduate?” shrug)
As unconcerned as I may look on the outside, this question has been bothering me a lot more than I care to admit. When I listen to other people share their summer plans, my heart sinks lower and lower in my chest. It seems like everybody and their mother are going to rescue babies in Africa or drink overpriced coffee in Italy or begin a startup in Portland. Soon enough, I begin to believe that everyone else is going to have a better summer than me.
That doesn't have to be true, though.
Having exciting plans does not automatically mean other people will have better summers than I will. What I constantly have to remind myself is that the quality of my summer is ultimately up to me. It’s not up to my location or my job or the people I’m with.
The fact of the matter is we have all been given four months to do something with our lives, and it’s up to us what we are going to do. Four months. There is a lot that can be done in four months. If we limit our enjoyment to our plans, we are putting ourselves in a box before the summer has even started!
Don’t put yourself in a box.
Instead of viewing my question mark of a summer with dread, I should view it as a summer of infinite possibilities. I can choose to look for moments of personal transformation and growth. I can choose to be happy and to enjoy myself, even if I’m not doing what I would like to be doing. Plans and events can only take me so far; my outlook is what can take me farther.
When the end of August rolls around and we are all back at school, I would like to be able to look back at my summer and smile. I don’t know what’s in store for me yet, but knowing that I can always choose happiness makes my giant question mark of a summer seem a little less foreboding.
