Before last Saturday night, strip clubs were compartmentalized in my brain as something that only exist in movies. I mean, of course I knew they existed in real life too, but the idea of them felt so far from my own reality that I honestly forgot that they are actually very alive and well even in my community. Now, they're all I seem to think about.
I went to a strip joint on Glenstone because my friend had just started working there and I wanted to support her. After all, taking your clothes off and dancing nearly naked in front of complete strangers must take a little getting used to. She has only been working there for three weeks. I went with two other friends who knew her as well. For the sake of security, we will call her Lilly. The three of us parked and walked into to a dim building bursting with distasteful country music. We gave our I.D.s to the guy at the door and we got in for free because we knew Lilly. As soon as I stepped through the door I felt like I was in a different universe. A dystopia maybe?
I didn't feel uncomfortable, I didn't feel awkward, but I did feel something and since then I still can't put my finger on how to describe what I felt. The seats are red velvet, there are two poles with a woman dancing on each, and lots of testosterone and male desperation. The music wasn't unpleasant per say, but I didn't enjoy it either. It was music you'd figure the demographic of men who often attend strip clubs would enjoy. We took a seat toward the back and waited for Lilly to make her moment on the pole; she was up walking around talking to the customers when we arrived. Maybe talking isn't the right word...teasing may be more appropriate. I looked around the room and just took it all in. I carefully observed the men with their straight faces (pun intended), the many empty glasses once filled with cheap liquor, and absolutely gorgeous women.
These women were of all shapes and sizes and every single one of them left me awestruck. I mean, these women had talent! The strength and skill they require to do this job isn't easy. They were so flexible! It almost reminded me of a more sexualized circus act. I envied their sensuality and confidence. As a straight woman, I wasn't turned on in the slightest but I was bewildered. It was truly impressive what they could do. I couldn't help but cheer them on, which undoubtedly deflated some of the attendee's erections. Lilly performed and we got a front row view. She was flawless. Every movement precise. I gave her ten one dollar bills, nothing compared the other men next to us. These men come loaded with hundreds of ones for these women, I've never seen anything like it. We sat back down in our previous corner of the club and observed more. That's when I started to really dig into my thoughts on these observations and the first thing that came to mind was "why?"
Why do places like this exist? Why do men feel the urge to experience this? Why not women? Why did we as a society let this happen? I started to answer the questions for myself under the hazy lights and stench of masculinity. Strip clubs or other places of the sort have existed for centuries. Peep shows, cabarets, nudie bars, whatever your phrase of choice may be can trace back to even before Shakespeare's time. Women have been paid for sexual acts since what seems to be the beginning of money itself. But why? To me, the logical thing to do was to think of the scientific reasons for this trend. The male brain is wired to reproduce in order to create dominance over its own race. When they see something desirable, their brains literally send signals that basically say "go hump that". That's why men think about sex so often because they're literally created to do so. Strip clubs essentially send those signals to their brains and the men feel satisfaction from it.
On the opposing end, women are created to carry a child. (Ok, I know women are much more than this obviously, but in a strictly scientific perspective this is true). Their brains tell them they need to find one suitable mate for a short interaction to become pregnant and then they continue on their way. They aren't technically wired to pounce on something that turns them on. Therefore, it makes sense why there are significantly less male strip clubs. Women don't get the same signals from their brains as men do. Even when women do attend male strip clubs, most of them are cheering and laughing rather than staring silently and drooling. We've all seen Magic Mike…it's a big fun party for women, but for men it's a serious encounter. Most men who go to strip clubs truly let themselves believe that these women care about them. They think they have a special relationship with these naked women when in reality it's just a paycheck for them.
After deciphering this, my last question still remained: why did we let this happen? Sure, I had a fun time watching my friend do incredibly difficult things in the nude, but I still felt a little dirty. Society could have easily just said "no, we're not going to give men a place to be horny and to sexualize women for their own pleasure", but we didn't. Centuries ago, our society just simply allowed men to do whatever they wanted. Sounds pretty similar to today. Of course I am all about women owning their decisions to do what they want with their bodies, but maybe if we could go back in time we could have just said no. No you can't sit there with a hard on and a smirk on your face, no you can't fling your filthy money at these gorgeous women who have absolutely no desire for you, and NO you can't pay women to objectify themselves for your own goddamn pleasure. Society just let these grubby men get away with it, and society will continue to do so.
Even after writing this, I still can't pair a word to how I feel about strip clubs. I had a great time, but I can't help but feel that it's still a little wrong. It's narrowed down to science, but if you ask me sometimes we shouldn't do as science says. To all the strippers out there, you are positively astonishing and I respect you with all my being. I am proud of those who find power in their work. I'm still left in wonderment by you, but at the end of the day, I wish science would have been different so that our society maybe could have had a chance to be different too.
