Stories From My Life That Will Make You Glad You're Not Me

Stories From My Life That Will Make You Glad You're Not Me

Hannah Hilty

Did you do something dumb today? Have you ever had such a bad day that you want to read about people messing up worse than you? Everybody makes mistakes, and sometimes, you can’t do anything else but laugh at them. So if you’re having a bad day, just remember, you’re not as awkward as Hannah Hilty.

1. I met my elementary art teacher a while back and we had a fairly long conversation. It was really nice to catch up with her, because she was one of my first inspirations to draw. Turns out the entire conversation she thought that I was my older sister. I probably should’ve been tipped off when she talked about how I used to draw pictures of dragons for her.

2. One time I had a half hour break from work but nowhere to spend it. I was too afraid to go anywhere, so after joking to a friend that I was going to hide in my car, I hid in my car. Turns out she saw me walk all the way to my car and crawl inside.

3. Once I pretended to be my mother-of-two coworker because I was too afraid to correct the person on the other line of the phone call. I told her all about how my kids are enjoying summer and the like.

4. One time a man at my work yelled at me because he wanted to know what’s in a quesadilla and I said, “Cheese.” I guess he wanted to know what kind of meat to put in it, and eventually hung up on me without a warning. I've never heard person so furious about a cheese-filled tortilla.

5. I used to think “morning sickness” meant how some mornings you wake up feeling sick, but throughout the day you feel better. I only learned the truth junior year of high school.

6. One time in drama club I was told not to improv because I was so bad at it.

7. Once during work, a phone that never rings actually rang. Answering phones wasn't included in my workload. So I slowly unplugged the phone cable until the ringing stopped. No one was any the wiser.

8. I broke the community microwave when my ramen noodles in a travel coffee mug happened to explode.

9. My family lasted about twenty-three years without any broken bones. I destroyed that streak when I walked down the stairs and somehow broke my foot. Then I cried in front of the entire drama club and had to be carried to my parents' car by a very buff guy.

10. I once thought I saw my friend across campus, so I walked all the way over to him, only to realize it was the wrong guy. But I had to stare at the poor dude for a good thirty seconds before I realized. Saw him again recently and he directly avoided me.

Did these tales of my awkwardness brighten your day? Did they help you forget about the embarrassing stuff that happened to you today? I hope so! When you do something dumb, just remember, there's someone else in the world making even worse mistakes!

(I mean, probably not, but whatever makes you feel better right?)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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