Stop Shaming Unconventional Beauty
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Stop Shaming Unconventional Beauty

Because I'm tired of being told I look ridiculous.

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Stop Shaming Unconventional Beauty
Gracie Fumic

This past weekend, my university's choir had a combined concert with the local community chorus in which we sang a Brahms piece with the local community orchestra. Most individuals involved in these combined ensembles are college students ranging from 18 to 23 years old, middle-aged parents and couples, and many retired older folk. After our dress rehearsal ended, we filed into our seats to listen to our directors' notes on what we could have improved in the performance. I was in a perfectly nice mood when a girl in my section leans over and says, "The old lady behind me is talking about you!" Naturally, I retort with, "What was she saying?" My fellow soprano then proceeds to tell me that she just overheard the elderly community chorus member behind her saying to a woman standing next to her, "What is that piece of metal hanging out of that girl's nose? That is just disgusting," while shooting dirty looks in my direction.

The woman was talking about my septum piercing, of course. I'm cognizant of the fact that it is not the most common piercing choice among body modifiers, and I know judgement comes with any aesthetic change a person may make to his or her appearance. My mom won't let me into our house unless I flip the nose ring up into my nostrils so she doesn't have to look at it. I'm well aware of the judgement that comes with these personal choices. However, this particular instance just hit me a little bit harder than others. And interestingly, I had a flashback to one of the countless times my father said to me and my brother:

If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

I laughed as I typed that sentence because it feels ridiculous to be 20 years old and writing that phrase in an article at the end of my second year of my undergrad. But, as I clearly experienced the other night, a 75-year-old woman still can't seem to grasp that concept. You would think that someone with that much life experience would know that many college students experiment with fashion, style and appearance in general. Your youth is a time to look however you want before you conform to the "real world," (in other words, getting a real job in your field of study, post-college, where you might not be allowed to have body modifications).

Piercings are not my own personal form of hatred towards the world. I do not get them because they make me any better or worse than someone without them. They do not equate to any dissatisfaction with my inner conscience or self-confidence levels, nor am I protesting the conservative establishment...

I think they are pretty on me, and that is that.

Even as a very young child, I remember walking through Target and seeing a person with blue hair, piercings, and tattoos all over her arms. My mom scoffed and muttered some comment about how ridiculous the girl looked, but I thought she was beautiful—I was in awe of how eye-catching she was. Sure, she was "different" in comparison to other kinds of people I'd been exposed to, but there in Target, I learned as a 5-year-old kid that beauty is not what others tell you it is. Beauty is relative and can mean 30 different things to 30 different people.

Beauty is natural hair and beauty is styled hair. No makeup, lots of makeup, a little bit. A body that is heavy, thin, muscular and every type somewhere in between: beautiful. Piercings and tattoos? Great. No body modifications or dyed hair? Lovely. The thing is, there's this nifty thing we have called free will. No matter what some judgmental person in passing might say about your appearance, no one can take away your personal sense of self, nor can they make you feel any less secure in your own skin—unless you let them.

You're the only one in this life who has to live in your body. Make the most of that and whatever that means to you. But most importantly, don't judge someone else's personal aesthetic choices because you might not make the same ones.

Let's all be whatever beautiful means to us, and let's appreciate our right to show it.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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