Stop Letting Your Insecurities Ruin Your Life

Stop Letting Your Insecurities Ruin Your Life

You're only hurting yourself
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Imagine this: You’re having a nice time with your friends, you’re out at a concert, you’re hearing an artist that you LOVE and you’ve been looking forward to it for - forever. You and your friends are having a blast. You guys are enjoying the show, and you’re taking videos and snapping pictures like crazy. You want everyone to join in on this amazing experience with you. After the show is over, you go home. You lay in your bed, your ears still ringing from the loudspeakers, but you’re happy. You start to go through your pictures and your heart sinks. You don’t look as good as thought you did. You don’t look as good as you felt. Immediately, you roll your eyes. All the joy from that incredible experience has faded. You start thinking about how you’re never wearing that outfit again. You start to point out all the places you think you look fat, and wonder, why you're nose, looks big, and your eyes look lopsided. There’s no way you’re sharing those pictures now.

Now imagine this: Next time you go to a show, you’re a little more reserved. You don’t want to just smile and have fun- instead, you’re worrying about what you look like, and how your outfit looks on you. All your pictures have to be posed just right, and you end up missing some of a great night because of your insecurities.

But why? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we think that we have to be perfect all the time?

In a way it’s biblical to strive for “perfection” We are supposed to want to be like Jesus, who was perfect. But the kind of perfection that Jesus was/is is nothing like society’s definition of perfection. We’re so obsessed with our looks in our society, but apparently, God doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal, here’s what the bible has to say about what Jesus looked like: “There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance, nothing to attract us to him.” (Isaiah 53:2) Basically, Jesus was not exactly the kind to stand out in a crowd, definitely not the kind of guy you expected to be the son of God. But He is.

Jesus’ perfection was because everything about Him was holy and pure. He never had a bad or selfish intention in His whole life. But our view of perfection has little to do with what’s inside and everything to do with how we appear.

When we’re so caught up in our appearance it sucks the fun and enjoyment out of everything. When we see pictures of ourselves that aren’t necessarily the most flattering all we can focus on is how bad we look and everything we want to change about ourselves instead of stopping to remember the moment that the photo was taken in. Maybe you were sitting in a weird way because you and all your friends were squeezed on a couch so that you could all fit, and someone told a joke right as the camera was about to go off. That moment is a fun and sweet moment, and because all you can think about is your outward appearance you’ve practically forgotten it. You banish the picture and beg all your friends not to post it anywhere. But why? Why do we have to let our insecurities and idea of perfection ruin our moments and memories?

Oh- wait… We don’t!

We’re all buying into the idea that to be beautiful is to always look like a picture straight out of a magazine. But that’s just not true. These days, the pictures in magazines don’t even actually look like the people who modeled them because of all the photoshop and editing.

To be beautiful you just have to be. You have to love, and you have to be able to just enjoy a moment. It’s beautiful to be free, to be vulnerable, to be kind, to be happy, to be loving and caring. It’s beautiful to be more in love with moments than the pictures that come from them. Who cares if you don’t always look like a million bucks, if you feel like a million bucks then what does it matter? It really doesn’t. Stop letting your insecurities ruin life’s greatest moments. You’re the only one who’s missing out.

Cover Image Credit: We Capture

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8 Struggles Of Being 21 And Looking 12

The struggle is real, my friends.
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“You'll appreciate it when you're older." Do you know how many times my mom has told me this? Too many to count. Every time I complain about looking young that is the response I get. I know she's right, I will love looking young when I'm in my 40s. However, looking young is a real struggle in your 20s. Here's what we have to deal with:

1. Everyone thinks your younger sister or brother is the older one.

True story: someone actually thought my younger sister was my mom once. I've really gotten used to this but it still sucks.

2. You ALWAYS get carded.

Every. Single. Time. Since I know I look young, I never even bothered with a fake ID my first couple of years of college because I knew it would never work. If I'm being completely honest, I was nervous when I turned 21 that the bartender would think my real driver's license was a fake.

3. People look at your driver's license for an awkward amount of time.

So no one has actually thought my real driver's license is fake but that doesn't stop them from doing a double take and giving me *that look.* The look that says, “Wow, you don't look that old." And sometimes people will just flat out say that. The best part is this doesn't just happen when you're purchasing alcohol. This has happened to me at the movie theater.

SEE ALSO: 10 Things People Who Look 12 Hate Hearing

4. People will give you *that look* when they see you drinking alcohol.

You just want to turn around and scream “I'M 21, IT'S LEGAL. STOP JUDGING ME."

5. People are shocked to find out you're in college.

If I had a dollar for every time someone had a shocked expression on their face after I told them I'm a junior in college I could pay off all of my student loan debt. It's funny because when random people ask me how school is going, I pretty much assume they think I'm in high school and the shocked look on their face when I start to talk about my college classes confirms I'm right.

6. For some reason wearing your hair in a ponytail makes you look younger.

I don't understand this one but it's true. Especially if I don't have any makeup on I could honestly pass for a child.

7. Meeting an actual 12-year-old who looks older than you.

We all know one. That random 12-year-old who looks extremely mature for her age and you get angry because life isn't fair.

8. Being handed a kids' menu.

This is my personal favorite. It happens more often than it should. The best part of this is it's your turn to give someone a look. The look that says, "You've got to be kidding me".

Looking young is a real struggle and I don't think everyone realizes it. However, with all the struggles that come with looking young, we still take advantage of it. Have you ever gone to a museum or event where if you're under a certain age you get in for a discounted price? Yeah? Well, that's when I bet you wish you were us. And kids' meals are way cheaper than regular meals so there have definitely been a couple times when I've kept that kids' menu.

So, all in all, it's not the worst thing in the world but it's definitely a struggle.

Cover Image Credit: Jenna Collins

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No, Blondes Don't Have More Fun

Assumptions of personality traits based on hair color are lies.

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Blondes are notorious for two things: the "dumb blonde" stereotype and the phrase "blondes have more fun" (which, up until recently, I didn't realize originates from a Dolly Parton song).

I spent my entire life as a blonde up until the moment I bought brown hair dye on a whim and changed the color of my hair nearly a month ago. Since doing so, the phrase "blondes have more fun" sounds like utter rubbish.

I feel as though I engage in more "crazy" activities since becoming a brunette: vaping, participating in activities I would have never considered trying before. Sure, I could chalk this up to me feeling like a different, changed person with the idea "new hair, new me."

The thing that gets me, though, is that I feel like I have been granted permission to "have fun" because I'm no longer weighed down by the "dumb blonde" stereotype. Before, I was so concerned about not doing something stupid or saying something stupid; if I did, I was feeding into the stereotype. Now, there's no weight attached. I no longer worry about appearing stupid.

Putting this aside, a hair color doesn't define someone's personality. It's silly to think that way.

I went from blonde to brunette, and I have no intention to go back anytime soon.

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