How To Stay Awake 24/7
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

How To Stay Awake 24/7

Never miss out on a fun event because you're too tired!

333
How To Stay Awake 24/7
Facebook.

I've been drinking caffeinated drinks since I was six years old. Nothing too bad, just a cup of green tea every few days. By middle school, I had to drink two thermoses of tea every day just to stay awake. My best friend at the time noticed and told me I should stop drinking so much caffeine; I retaliated by making a Facebook page titled "Caffeine for a Better and More Awake Tomorrow."

Honestly, is that not the most cringe-worthy thing you've ever seen? Not only did I legitimately make this page and post statuses, I liked by own updates. Dear 13-year-old me, please stay off the internet.

Anyway, my caffeine addiction progressed until I was drinking two energy drinks a day. My coach finally told me that I wouldn't be able to compete unless I stopped, and the first month after stopping drinking cold-turkey was filled with panic attacks and pretty much mental death.

But no one wants to hear how bad caffeine is for you. So now that you've been warned that caffeine is addictive and hard to stop drinking, I won't feel bad telling you (using Wikihow illustrations of "How to Quit Caffeine") how to drink it so regularly that you never have to sleep.

Step 1: Buy a thermos

Let me tell you, coffee costs a lot. So if you can buy a thermos and fill it with free coffee at Bruff or at the Dean's office, you're well on your way to being able to maintain a healthy addiction.

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F11%2F04%2F636138809427089439-1655529253_savemoney.webp&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=606&h=43a9fffaa52d3ccbdc7fd450c77993ce71a40a413a73044403a780e4a87604c2&size=980x&c=2879970336 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F11%252F04%252F636138809427089439-1655529253_savemoney.webp%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D606%26h%3D43a9fffaa52d3ccbdc7fd450c77993ce71a40a413a73044403a780e4a87604c2%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2879970336%22%7D" expand=1 original_size="1x1"]

Step 2: Set a schedule

Make sure you're never itching to get your next fix! If you go too long, you might crash. I recommend starting with a good two to three cups in the morning, then make sure you drink 64 o.z. of black coffee every day. If you drink a bunch of coffee, you'll never have to drink water again.

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F11%2F04%2F636138810114334217-1294871402_scheule.webp&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=465&h=d715eaea4a1b4e4019fb9efc01f6e48b82317fc6aac8c98809d974912dab5f3a&size=980x&c=3996567464 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F11%252F04%252F636138810114334217-1294871402_scheule.webp%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D465%26h%3Dd715eaea4a1b4e4019fb9efc01f6e48b82317fc6aac8c98809d974912dab5f3a%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3996567464%22%7D" expand=1 original_size="1x1"]

Step 3: Do the opposite of what you do on a night out

You know all those tips we learned to make sure you don't die of alcohol abuse? Yeah, throw those out. You want to be able to suck the caffeine into your bloodstream as quickly as possible.

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F11%2F04%2F6361388085156098861258500133_nodrink.webp&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=894&h=b6ea222bef2f7a9a2bb3602e998a551267ed9488e9f7435b7a23bdd1db66b58d&size=980x&c=3937078311 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F11%252F04%252F6361388085156098861258500133_nodrink.webp%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D894%26h%3Db6ea222bef2f7a9a2bb3602e998a551267ed9488e9f7435b7a23bdd1db66b58d%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3937078311%22%7D" expand=1 original_size="1x1"]

Step 4: Drink black coffee

Anyone who can't drink black coffee is weak. You know what could take the place of the copious amount of milk and sugar that some people put in their drinks? More coffee. This is essentially a hard-core diet; you gotta be able to commit.

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F11%2F04%2F636138801031201796-1331218760_goodcoffee.webp&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=952&h=a86cf10ce047811a1167cb1f3842fbf71dd91e7c0767f52d85bad4ab042374a2&size=980x&c=3866523648 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F11%252F04%252F636138801031201796-1331218760_goodcoffee.webp%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D952%26h%3Da86cf10ce047811a1167cb1f3842fbf71dd91e7c0767f52d85bad4ab042374a2%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3866523648%22%7D" expand=1 original_size="1x1"]

Step 5: Never stop

Once you've followed all these steps, you'll be a successful addict. You'll feel like crap every day and you'll never sleep, but trust me, it feels worse is you decide to kick your addiction. Here's the truth: no one cares if you're healthy as long as you're getting work done. You can get straight A's, have a social life, and still have hobbies as long as you get rid of the unhealthy amount of time you sleep.

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F11%2F04%2F636138803263536380-2010903292_badsleep.webp&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=188&h=582b329246bdf5648ecb45919b2cb52938770f931384cc57de7916b78801f6b6&size=980x&c=3291785644 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F11%252F04%252F636138803263536380-2010903292_badsleep.webp%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D188%26h%3D582b329246bdf5648ecb45919b2cb52938770f931384cc57de7916b78801f6b6%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3291785644%22%7D" expand=1 original_size="1x1"]

Now you've been given all the tools you need to develop a sustainable addiction. Happy drinking!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

'Hotel Transylvania: Transformania' Film Review

Solid animation can't raise the newest entry in Sony's colorful monster series beyond the basics

53162
'Hotel Transylvania: Transformania' Film Review
Photo Credit: Amazon Prime Video – YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6suJohjIvfo

I take a slight issue with the idea that Adam Sandler didn’t have a good dramatic role until ‘Uncut Gems,’ what about ‘Hotel Transylvania’ (he says semi-seriously)?’

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

4 Common Reasons Couples Get Divorced

Are some people just not meant to be together? Is there any way to prevent an impending divorce?

82327
4 Common Reasons Couples Get Divorced

We've all heard the statistics. Roughly 50% of married couples eventually end up divorced. This can lead to complications, problems with your children, financial issues, and no small amount of negative emotions.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

​Pets are Good for the Soul

Millions of Americans have found comfort in pet ownership. The media has been awash with stories about a surge in pet ownership, as Americans have taken advantage of the ability of pets to improve emotional well-being.

78927
Good for the Soul
Pets are Good for the Soul

America is going through a mental health crisis. This crisis predates the global pandemic, but has in many ways been dramatically exacerbated by it. In 2019, 19.86% of adults, or 50 million Americans, reported suffering from a mental illness. The emotional toll of the pandemic has been heavy, with over half of U.S. adults saying that they have experienced stress and worry related to Covid-19. Anxieties over work, uncertainty about the future and other triggers have intensified the mental health crisis. Millions of Americans have found comfort in pet ownership. The media has been awash with stories about a surge in pet ownership, as Americans have taken advantage of the ability of pets to improve emotional well-being.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How Your Sleep Position Affects Your Health?

You changed into your pajamas, turn off the lights, and get yourself ready to sleep. How do you prefer to sleep, on the back, on your side, or on your tummy? Although there’s no scientific result that sleeping position affects your back, here are some interesting facts that have been discovered.

183182
Sleep Position

You changed into your pajamas, turn off the lights, and get yourself ready to sleep. How do you prefer to sleep, on the back, on your side, or on your tummy? Although there’s no scientific result that sleeping position affects your back, here are some interesting facts that have been discovered.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How to Throw the Ultimate Winter Bash

As the year starts to come to an end, make sure you find the time to have some fun as well.

124650
Ultimate Winter Bash

As the year starts to come to an end, make sure you find the time to have some fun as well.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments