Starbucks just came out with their newest Halloween concoction: the Phantom Frappuccino. It sounds pretty appealing - it's vegan and full of fruity flavors like mango, pineapple, and coconut. It doesn't sound too bad right?
Pruébame… si te atreves #PhantomFrappuccino *Disponible del 21 de octubre al 1 de noviembre en todas nuestras tien… https://t.co/n8oNrC5XcH— Starbucks España (@Starbucks España) 1571647603.0
Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention that it's BLACK and covered in GREEN SLIME. I'm sorry, but that's disgusting. I don't care how fruity and sweet this Frapp is - I DO NOT want it. I don't want to see it, and I sure as heck DON'T want to drink it.
Thankfully, this nasty mix is only available in certain European markets, which means I don't have to see anyone around me Instagramming it or walking around campus with it. Also, it's VERY limited-edition - this ghoulishly gross drink is only available from October 26 to 31. Thank goodness, because I don't think I could handle this thing existing for more than a week.
It honestly looks like a science experiment gone very, very WRONG. I just don't understand - why and how is it black? What exactly is the green slime? Why would a fruity flavored drink be such an unappealing color?
I'm all for everything spooky and Halloween-themed, but this is just too far. Disgusting and gruesome looks are perfect for Halloween, but those looks are NOT something I want to see in my food or beverages. A fruity-flavored drink? Awesome. A black and lime green slimy concoction? Yeah, absolutely NOT awesome.
To whichever high-up executive that thought this would be a good idea, you owe an apology to me and Starbucks-lovers everywhere. Honestly, you owe your brand an apology because this monstrosity of a drink does NOT belong in the safe haven that is Starbucks. There is one place and one place only that this frightening Frapp belongs: the garbage.