What Do You Do if A Loved One Needs an Intervention?

What Do You Do if A Loved One Needs an Intervention?

When stepping in can save a life.

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I watch the A&E; TV show Intervention on a regular basis, and the stories are both sad and frightening. There are so many things that can trigger someone to become an addict, and once they begin it's very, very hard to stop.

So what if you have a loved one that needs help? How do you pull off your very own intervention?

Form a Group

Who's going to participate in the intervention? Who's going to help plan it? There should be a specific group, although not everyone who helps with planning has to participate.

It can be helpful to have a professional present at the intervention, or you could choose to consult a professional during the planning but not have them physically attend. It depends on how big the group is and how likely you are to need an outside perspective.

Having one or more non-family members present can be helpful, though, especially if things get heated. A more neutral point of view can help keep everyone calm.

Know the Situation

Even though you may be angry at your addicted friend or loved one, remember that there's always a reason that they began taking drugs. Drugs tend to be an escape mechanism from pain.

What painful events has your friend or loved one faced? Have they been abused? Dealt with death or divorce? Had a bankruptcy or other financial embarrassment?

Knowing the core of the matter can help you be compassionate instead of angry, and if you address these core problems you may be able to get through an addict's defensiveness.

Find a Good Treatment Facility

Part of the strategy of a good intervention is to not give the addict a chance to change their mind once they agree to treatment. They should be moved as quickly as possible to the treatment facility.

Finding a good facility can be difficult since it shouldn't be too close to home. Everlast Recovery can be a great option since it's set in a beautiful location in California.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) can also be a very valuable resource. It's essential to have a facility selected before the intervention.

Plan Statements and Consequences

There to need to be clear, and often severe, consequences if an addict decides to stay on drugs. Perhaps they will be cut off from the family, or you will report them to social services so their children can be in a safer environment.

Have each person make notes about specific instances of problems, how they feel about the behavior, and how much they want the addict to get help. Some members of the team may want to simply write out their statement as a letter.

Do a Practice Run

Of course, the addict should not know about the intervention until it happens. However, the rest of the group should have one or more practice runs so that they can rehearse their statements. It's also important to practice emotional control.

You can have someone from the planning group stand in for the addict, and you may want to work through more than one scenario about how he or she might react.

Having a calm, united front will be vital on the day the actual intervention occurs.

Hold the Intervention and Follow Up

The intervention should be secret from the addict until the last minute. Once the person does or doesn't agree to go to treatment, the consequences should be immediate. This means an immediate trip to the facility or immediate negative consequences from family and friends.

Don't shy away from carrying out your ultimatums. When you're serious, they may reconsider!

Having a family or friend struggling with addiction is very hard. An intervention may save their life. Don't wait another day – get started!

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Deadlines Are Not Important

The Deadlines Of Life Do Not Mean As Much As You Think

merew14
merew14
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Deadlines are not important; the deadlines for work, school, and things related to that, those are important. Life's deadlines are not important. Society tells us that we must be married, have the perfect job, and have children by a certain age. A lot of the times we end up believing that if we do not do certain things by a certain time, we have failed or we are not doing as good as everyone else. The truth is, society's and life's deadlines are crap. There is no specific time to be married by, no specific time to have your perfect job by, and no specific time to have children by. These things should not be accomplished until you are ready and capable to accomplish them; this means that if you are not 50 until you have your perfect job, you are not 30 until you are married and you are not 40 until you have children, that is okay. There is nothing wrong with waiting, experiencing life, growing in who you are, and doing what you need to do first. A lot of people do not have their perfect job until later in life because if we are all honest here, that is one of the hardest things to figure out and hardest decisions to make. People stress so much because they have not met these certain deadlines of life that they have been told their entire lives they need to meet by a certain time. So often, the important things like a job, a marriage, and children are rushed and people end up miserable. There is no sense in rushing if you are not ready for it yet. When it comes to finding the perfect job for you, look around, find your interests, and figure out what you can spend years of your life doing; take your time and be patient. When it comes to marriage and having children, do not rush it, it is one of the worst things to rush; do it in the time frame you want to and make sure it is what you want. Take a deep breathe and stop freaking out; you have plenty of time. Instead of going by society's and life's deadlines, go by your own and base that off of your capabilities and your wants.

merew14
merew14

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How to Fail in Business – When You’re Really Trying

You can try so hard - and mess it all up. Learn how not to!

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I've been working my business full-time for almost four years. Despite my hard work, my business very nearly failed.

I made a lot of mistakes that lead to this. I want to share those with you, so that you can learn from what I did – and have better success than my business has had.

Wait Too Long to Make the Leap

I was in a very comfortable, stable, and BORING day job. I had dead-ended in my career years before I finally had the courage to leave.

68% of employees in corporate jobs are disengaged. I was one of those folks. I had my business as a side-hustle, and it provided additional income. But I waited three years before I took my business full time!

Why?

Honestly, I let fear and security win the day – until I was truly desperate and HAD to leave. And unfortunately, that led to my second mistake.

Leave Your Job Without Savings

So, while I was comfortable, I wasn't building my income. I let myself get lazy – even though I had a business on the side. It was very difficult to prospect at night when all I wanted to was veg.

Plus, at the same time I was running my side-hustle, I was dating and eventually marrying my husband. That took a lot of energy, and I was more interested in spending time with him than in building my uncertain business.

As a result, when I finally reached my absolute limit and finally gave my two-week notice, I didn't have a cushion saved up. I had a retirement account – and I used it entirely the first year of my business.

Not recommended.

Fall For All the Marketing

I'll tell you the honest truth. It's really hard to resist the temptation to spend like crazy when you have your own business.

I had excellent credit. (HAD.) As a result, I was approved for a strong credit limit on my business credit card. And I took full advantage!

A lot of this had to do with the fact that I fell for a LOT of marketing messages. You know all the folks that say, "I built my business 1000% in one month using these five strategies?"

They're lying!

If I had realized that MUCH earlier, that alone could have helped my business stay a lot more healthy.

Here's the dirty truth – they grew their business 1000% by preying on the uncertainty of beginning business owners like you. They'll give you some generic strategies in their course – assuming you even finish it. But your results will not be theirs, because you're not following the REAL business model.

I also liked the feeling of traveling to business conferences. And those conference hotels are NOT cheap. I whipped out the credit card, oblivious. Oh – and business conferences are one more giant sales pitch. Don't fall for it.

Finding Your Footing

I made all of these mistakes, and my business is still alive. It's very rough and my family is in a deep hole. At this point I only qualify for the types of credit cards Bonsai Finance recommends for folks with bad credit. But I'm still kicking!

A lot of what I did to right the ship was to get back to my core service – freelance writing – and stop chasing every other "success story" out there. I started ignoring the marketing messages. I stopped believing the "I can show you a way to easy money," lies.

If you've found yourself struggling in your business, you may be making these mistakes. Hopefully this article has given you some clarity so you can see the way out!

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