The Best Parts About Being A Southern Pittsburgher

The Best Parts About Being A Southern Pittsburgher

Growing up with sweet tea and six rings.
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Although I was born and raised in North Carolina, my parents' household was run as if it were smack dab in central Pennsylvania. My parents relocated to Raleigh from Altoona, Pennsylvania after graduating from Penn State in the late 80’s. This re-location to The Triangle turned out to be a common thing for many Northerners to do. It is easy to see the infiltration of Northern culture into the south. Don’t believe me? All you have to do is take a trip down the highway and count the number of Steeler bumper stickers, license plates, and flags you see.

In fact, a few years back, the Carolina Panthers had to ask their fans not to give their tickets to Steeler fans when the Panthers and the Steelers played a pre-season game at Bank of America Stadium because they did not want to be embarrassed by all of the Terrible Towels waving in their home stadium. ESPN put up a video of fans at a Carolina Hurricanes game against the Penguins at PNC Arena (should I remind you that PNC is a Pittsburgh company?) a year back captioned, “Raleigh: Pittsburgh South” when the whole stadium started chanting for the Penguins dressed in black and gold. Being a Pittsburgher in the South- whether in Pittsburgh South or another area of Steeler Nation- is a culture of its own. If you are a Southern Pittsburgher, you will probably recognize a few of these…

Seeing someone in public with a Pittsburgh jersey on.


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Well, looks like you have met your new best friend for the next fifteen minutes while you discuss all things Pittsburgh.


Rolling up next to another car with a crapload of Pittsburgh stickers like


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Yep, I have definitely started blasting Renegade once with a stranger in the lane next to me and we were totally vibing.

Actually having friends with the same obsession for Pittsburgh puts you at a deep level of understanding.

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Having someone you can complain about Tomlin (and that stupid face he makes when he calls a play wrong...again) with, the Walker trade from three years ago, or the current McCutchen trade and getting an equally pissed reaction is a magical thing.

When you realized Cower lived in Raleigh, so even he knows Pittsburgh is a southern thing too


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And flashback to that time you saw him at a Harris Teeter

Getting stalker pics of Pittsburgh legends from your relatives that still live in Pittsburgh and get to see your heroes every day:


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No, you aren’t jealous at all because... you know what?! Tey have to deal with stink bugs!

When you actually meet a famous Pittsburgher while you are in Pittsburgh, you feel the need to express that you are a special kind of fan


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Real picture of me after I had basically attacked Jay Hay last summer at a petting zoo outside of Pittsburgh. Also after I told him about a thousand times that I was better than the average fan because I wasn’t from Pittsburgh. #loyalty And he just laughed at me in case you were wondering...

When you need your Pittsburgh fix, you go to Pittsburgh Dad’s YouTube page:


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Even though it is sunnier here in The South, and that's supposed to make people happier or something, your father still has the Pennsylvania edge that Pittsburgh Dad does. Guaranteed. Plus, sometimes you need a good- old fashioned skit with tons of Pittsburgh references that would leave your non-Pittsburgh friends at a loss. Ex: "Yinz are acting like Antonio Brown stompped on your forehead"

You definitely want to join your local Steeler fan club:


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You may have even given it a go. Maybe it has even stuck! If it has, good for you! I have realized I would much rather look like a crazy person screaming at the TV in the comfort of my house- thank you!

You are un-apologetic about the aspects of Pittsburgh you hate:

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The cold. The crazy mountain hills. The cold.

You only want to get rich so you can afford to travel to every single home Steelers game:


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If only Pittsburgh weren’t so far away…

Cover Image Credit: Allison Mallory

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To College Kids Bankrolled By Their Parents, You Can't Put 'Spoiled' On A Resume

Do you expect Mommy and Daddy to foot your AmEx Black Card bill forever?
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Growing up, I never had things handed to me unless it was a present for a holiday or my birthday. I did chores for my allowance, I got a job as soon as I turned 16 and I paid for my very first car.

I worked every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at a pizza place for minimum wage while my friends went to football games and hung out. I worked two jobs my entire summer before freshman year of college so I could take freshman year to just get acclimated to school.

By spring semester of freshman year, I was applying for jobs and planning to work full time all summer along with taking some online classes.

Currently, I am in school full time and work 30+ hours a week, on top of writing for two publications.

But let me tell you, there is nothing that makes me more upset than kids whose parents hand them everything.

I know kids whose parents hand them money for concert tickets, brand name clothing, $1,000 monthly rent and the works. And honestly? It infuriates me.

The worst part about it? Half these kids complain about how difficult their lives are and how stressed they are. Try working an 8-hour shift from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. then having to get up at 5:30 a.m. the next morning to get ready for class, or going straight from class to work and trying to find time to get schoolwork done.

"Do your parents not care about you?"

I get that question all the time. They could pay for things for me, but they chose to teach me how to live like an adult and I truly appreciate it, even though it gets hard sometimes. They are always there to help me if I need it, but they do not spoil me.

I think everyone should have a job in college and have to pay for some things on their own. No, I'm not just talking about having a job for "pocket money."

Your parents pay for you to get a $70 manicure every 2 weeks and drop money in your account to spend at bars on the weekends? Good for you.

My parents pick up my phone bill and car insurance, but the rest is my responsibility. Rent, food, gas, clothes, school supplies, electricity, and anything else I want comes right out of my pocket.

I get that some parents just want their kids to focus on school, but honestly, without a job, I had way too much time freshman year. Why not use that time to work?

I know some people who have never worked a day in their life and it makes me wonder exactly what they expect out of the real world. Mommy and Daddy won't always be there to pay your Visa bill, honey.

You can't put "spoiled" on a job resume under previous experience.

Cover Image Credit: YouTube

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Being A Lesbian Sucks

To women who say they wish they were a lesbian; you don't.

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My girlfriend is not a man, obviously so because she is my girlfriend, emphasis on girl. Society has been conditioned with men holding the power. In a world dominated by men being a lesbian has more problems than just homophobia.

There is an automatic assumption that because we are not with a man we are single. Without the dominating presence of a man other men feel safe to come on to women in lesbian relationships, whether they know we are together or not. We aren't always in a safe situation to say we are together so if he doesn't pick up on the social cues it only gives us two options: politely laugh and attempt to remove ourselves from the situation or say we aren't interested. Both options are equal in undesirability and saying we are uninterested can lead to them just pushing harder. The boyfriend card usually works, but lying about our relationship makes us feel terrible.

The fetishizing of lesbian couples and threesomes are a problem because of media and porn. They hyper-sexualize lesbian relationships until they are nothing but sex. From this the winning question, "Do you want to have a threesome?" With the assumption both or one woman in the relationship is a lesbian and not bisexual, pansexual, or etc. A threesome with a man is completely out of the question. The thing about lesbians is that we like women not men, a threesome with a man goes against our identity as a lesbian and makes no sense. And even if both women are bisexual a normal man wouldn't walk up to a straight couple and pop the question of a threesome. So don't do it to us.

We also find ourselves being disrespected as a customer in a professional setting. Men in job positions belittle women who are at the mechanic, the lawyer, the doctors offices, and the bank, for just a few examples. They assume we don't know anything and are ignorant, so they treat us with no respect. They attempt to manipulate us for this and that to achieve their own personal gain. Without a man lesbian couples are even more subject to this because we don't get any respect. A man will be immediately respected and in a healthy relationship he can establish a power balance with his woman partner to the person in charge. Lesbians, (and other single women) don't have these short cuts. We have to establish ourselves then and there for having worth and show we deserve to be treated like full grown adults. Hopefully we also have the knowledge to not suffer from manipulation.

The difference in skill sets is something that can be a problem for everyone in this sexist society. We associate pink with girls and boys with blue. Girls with cooking and guys with tools. Most of us were taught different things and learned different skill sets. Most women I know, including me, don't know how to change a tire. How many young men go off to college having never done laundry in their life? With lesbians we usually don't know an important skill that was specifically taught to men. We might not know cars, or tools, or how to tile a floor. We are set back in our development as fully functional people in a unit. We lack key skill sets that were predetermined for men, unlike straight couples where there is usually a balance of skill sets.

The problems that arise from lesbian relationships are problems associated with a male dominating society and the gender division we face along with it. To abolish these we have to achieve equality and work on teaching the generations to follow that women are just as good as men. It's tough being a woman and a lesbian even harder.

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