How Social Media Is Ruining Relationships

How Social Media Is Ruining Relationships

Why "doing it for the gram" is getting old.
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Social Media; the good, the bad and the stalker. In this generation, social media is the center. While being a fairly new phenomenon, it has become so widespread across the world that it's actually considered unusual when a person doesn't have some form of social media. We eat, sleep, and breathe it. Literally. When we wake up in the morning, the first thing most of us do is click to twitter and scroll through to make sure that we don't miss a thing. Our friends, family and even that girl from history you pass in the hallway are right at our fingertips. Social media has completely changed the tone of relationships, and here's how.

1. It has become normal to "stalk" your significant other.

How dare he tweet her a smiley face emoji four years ago!? Really, though. Social media has made it completely normal to know every move your relationship partner makes, ever. You can track every follow, like and location. Contrary to popular belief, this is neither normal nor healthy for any relationship.

2. A "like" on a screen has become the largest romantic gesture.

Remember the days of love letters and opening car doors? Yeah, me neither. These days clicking "like" on an Instagram photo is considered the sweetest thing a person can do. Not to mention, when your significant other doesn't like your picture, it actually hurts your feelings. Isn't that crazy? Since when did our self validation come from a like on a screen? Why are our relationships centered around this?

3. Comparison.

This one can be kept short and sweet; comparison. Social media is filled with "#relationshipgoals"; pictures and videos of what the ideal relationship should look like. We see these photos and ask ourselves, "Why doesn't my relationship look like that? What's wrong with us? Why don't I have this?" The answer is nothing. The reality is that every relationship is different. We all have different love languages and different ways of expressing our love. Do not think that your relationship has to look like social media "goals" to be a good one. Do not think that you have to be in a relationship either, just because it's what the media says you're supposed to do. The wrong relationship is so much worse than no relationship at all. Not to mention, many of these photos/videos are all of the highs of relationships and none of the lows; those matter, too.

4. Disconnect.

What happened to looking someone in the eye? What happened to shaking hands, and ringing the doorbell for a date? Social media, while connecting us, has simultaneously disconnected us. Most of us literally do not know how to have a face to face conversation anymore. We start conversations over direct message on twitter and this is how we feel comfortable. It scares me because face to face interaction is what connects us all. It's the only way to truly get to know someone. I hate that we are falling in love over screens. There's nothing that could replace seeing a smile on someone's face or holding someone's hand for the first time. We need more of that, and less likes.

5. It dictates entirely the way we see others.

"She only got 60 likes? He doesn't have very many pictures. His captions are weird." Really? We're all guilty of this. We are all judgmental at some point, if not everyday. It's human nature and it's what we do. But how can we possibly think that a photo and the number of likes it has exemplifies who someone is as a person? We are so focused on these trivial things that we miss out on so many opportunities to get to know awesome people. It's so important to not let a social media site define you, or dictate the ways in which you define someone else.

Social media, as great as it can be for a lot of things, is becoming detrimental to relationships. We care more about likes than we do about connection. Learn to put your phone down and just live. Experience something amazing with people you love and just be there in that moment. Make an effort to build face to face relationships and you will be so appreciative for them. A screen should not be a companion.

Cover Image Credit: Google Images

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10 Reasons Your Big Sister Is The Best Person In Your Life

"There is no better friend than a sister, and there is no better sister than you."
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As much as I hate to admit it, my big sister might be sort-of, slightly, cooler than I am.

Sometimes. She's the one I call when I can't call mom and the only one in the family who can properly handle my attitude. Big sisters are the people you'd choose if they weren't already family, and here's why.

1. She is your first and truest friend.

Big sisters are (literally) there from day one. They see every dirty diaper, every bad haircut, and every melodramatic breakup. They deal with every bad day and drama queen attitude and still love you in the most unconditional way.

2. Her closet is your closet.

For some reason, her clothes always look better on you. Funny how that works, huh? With a big sister comes a big closet, and who doesn't love having a double wardrobe? I'd also like to take this opportunity to apologize for the clothes I will never give back (but I'm not really that sorry).

3. She knows what it's like to deal with your parents.

Anything you could possibly be going through, they went through it first. It's kind of like having an instruction manual or a key to the future. Either way, it's always nice to have someone who will always understand the struggle.

4. There are no boundaries.

Wanna dance around in your underwear all day? Cool. Life talks while she's on the toilet? Also cool. There's no awkward moments or changing in the bathroom with the door locked. There's just the kind of freedom that only comes with siblings.

5. Thanks to her, you know about all of the cool movies/music/fashion trends from years back.

Thanks to my sister, I have every Too $hort and Ludacris song you could ever think of downloaded on my phone. I've seen every cheesy '90s movie, and when a fad from 10 years ago comes back in, I already have the hookup.

6. She tells you like it is.

We all have those friends who tend to sugarcoat everything. Yeah, sisters don't do that. She's the first person to tell me when I'm making a terrible decision and that I really shouldn't triple text that boy again. She keeps it real with me and deals with my attitude, and that's why she's the best.

7. Her home is always open.

Sometimes you just need to get away from life and binge watch Netflix, and sometimes you need all of that plus your sister. She always has her door open when you're two seconds away from losing your mind, and she also has good takeout and a dog.

8. She knows what you're capable of.

My sister knows exactly who I am and what I can do. She knows when I'm not doing my best, and when I need to be set straight. She's always there to remind me who I am and what I'm capable of accomplishing. She's always been my biggest fan.

9. She's a lot cheaper than therapy.

For some reason, my sister always knows just what to say. Even if I don't see it at the time, she's usually right (don't tell her I said that). Big sisters are like wizards, somehow they always magically make you feel like life's gonna turn out alright in the end. If she wasn't already awesome at everything else, I'd suggest she be a therapist.

10. She will always be your go-to gal.

No matter the situation, she will always be by your side. There is nothing you could say or do to make a big sister leave, and that's why they're the best. Whether it's a speeding ticket, a mean girl or you just need to laugh, big sisters are always going to be there to lift your spirits and set you straight.

I couldn't make it without ya sis, I'm sorry for ratting you out on Thanksgiving that one time, and for running away at the zoo. Thanks for taking me to see Aaron Carter even though he's way too old to still be singing "I want Candy," and thank you always for being the best role model, sister and friend I could ask for.

Cover Image Credit: teaser-trailer.com

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Poetry On The Odyssey: It's a Girl

An ode to the little girl raised to be insecure.

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They raise little girls to be insecure

Little girls grow to be big girls

People always ask big girls why they're so insecure

Big girls aren't quite sure

Day after day the big girl can't keep up

She's exhausted

Her soul feels worn

The big girl learns to grow hard

In a way, she's a bit stronger

People call her a bitch

Bitch

What is that?

How can she let that affect her

It's simply the only way to be her

She mourns that little girl

Hoping that one day

She'll be strong


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