"How's your semester going?" "Great!"

It doesn't matter whether you've just bombed a midterm, you've just had a fight with your roommate, or your semester isn't going well at all. This is the response. Anything else might freak people out, and most of us just aren't prepared to do that. Because then we'd have to put out an...

The fact of the matter is though, our semester is always going "great" and it's definitely not always going "Great!". This is true in every part of life. People in grocery stores ask how you're doing, and you say "I'm good, how are you?" It's automatic. Then, if you branch out much beyond that, you might ask about the weather. Here at school, you might ask about registration, or the classes they're in, or the roommate you met that one night two years ago.

The point is, we're all guilty of it. And small talk certainly has its place. I would argue, though, that that place is the first 30 minutes of being friends with somebody and then. Never. Again. Afterwards. Here are some tips for ending small talk:

1. Ask about family.

People typically like talking about how cool their little brother is, how smart their little sister is, how tall their older (or younger, in my case) brother is, how well their sister is doing at her job. They love swapping stories about sweet things their parents have done, or talking about their grandparents' love story. So ask about it. It's a quick way to understand somebody better.

2. Ask about music.

You probably shouldn't lead with "do you like music" but there are lots of ways to bring this up. Chances are, you'll at least learn some new artists, if nothing else. I asked one of my friends about this, and his immediate response was to send me videos of Mongolian Throat Singing. The possibilities are truly endless, people, and all you have to do is ask.

3. Ask about favorites.

Everybody has a favorite something. If you get stuck on classes, ask about favorite professors. If you get stuck on weather, ask about favorite seasons. At least that way, you're learning something substantive about the person.

4. Let them in.

It's very hard to do, being vulnerable with somebody. But you can't expect to make it much past small talk if all you ever do is ask them questions without reciprocating. If they ask about something, give a full response, and really tell them about yourself. Tell stories about your childhood, talk about experiences you've had... Just be careful not to overpower the conversation.

5. Ask about situations.

This might be a bit deep for someone you're just meeting, so it's probably not quite the right question to ask. But the idea is sound: ask some hypotheticals. What if the Year 3000 by the Jonas Brothers is an accurate prediction of the future? What if dogs think about you as much as you think about them? What if The Good Place is right about what happens "next"? What if beavers could build houses for humans? You get the idea. Be normal about it, I guess, but present things you've thought about. They'll at least laugh.

Basically, avoid small talk. It's boring, and it's so much harder than just being real with them.