Processing emotions after a pretty horrid falling out:

Way down the street

I feel the day we did meet

And I hope and I know

You'll find life in a fresh snow

And I know and I hope

You love and live and die all fine

And that you don't stay wake and cry

There's a day a coming tomorrow

Where there won't be no sorrow

For you and me and him

As you sing your saviors hymn

And I hope and I cry

That you just don't die

Without the love so strong

And the bond so long

As I talk to my sacred shrink

And wonder just what you think

I know you're happy with what you did

And that's enough to seal that lid

Oh do you care of the nights

We'd be so alone with no plans

And we'd crawl out with a crazed ideal

Love the only thing we did feel

With the shock from an ancient eel

Oh boy where are you gonna go

And what will you hear

As I travel on down that road

And know you're gone for good

I hope one day our paths do cross

But I got friends, no need for pain

All those times I screamed in vain

Maybe you'll hear my rhyme

And think of that sealed away time

We'll find a fork in the street

And both go left, back to where we did meet

But until then my brother I hope you're set

With no fear and no present fret

You killed me twice

And I loved you thrice

I hope you're happy and you thrive

As I strive for the day we once felt

A day you'd cast of that old mink pelt

And realize I had all to give

You had no need for that rusted shiv

I hope they give all they can

You find your fabled holy land

I'll be there for you one day

Maybe then you'll learn to stay


. . .


Reconnecting (I begin to awkwardly rebuild our relationship (after some pretty serious alcoholism):

You made me cry, ya made me die and I won't lie, I loved it all

Your hair was long, the sun was bright, each day with a long night,

Music, smoke and words danced, our parents worried, and god we lived,

The town was ours, we owned it all, speeding round the turns of life,

We were young, we were ready, and we were wrong,

summer nights one day end, new ways round life's bend, alone, without friend,

No nights laced with liquor, deep in the woods, my secrets buried,

I painted my face in false martyrdom, we all wore masks in fear, the end was near,

But forward we marched, to the saintly cabin, resembling wisdom of Walden,

My will to live survived, but something must've died, the part I tried to hide,

We parted sadly, it was quick, but by no means painless,

Gone with the wind, gone was my friend, crown of thrones upon my head,

I was no Jesus, a plastic false riding on the dashboard of your car, forward we marched,

But hey that's ok, I used to be liquor to kill the pain, now it's love,

And one day I'll get on up there, way over the hill, be right where I want to be,

There's a sun shinning, full of life, a shadow of a cabin hidden behind,

Life is right, as right as can be, after all we've seen,

Although our eyes have aged, just for me, see the sun before it fades,

It hasn't expired just yet.


. . .


We have rebuilt... but it is still strange and estranged among us all:

Two lovers set adrift in life,

Effortlessly moving forward,

Yet a weight stayed behind,

Tried to stay so blind,

There was a little spot,

Oh so grand,

In each of their hearts,

Still full and young,

Waiting to see nostalgic bliss,

Of a unique blend,

With robust emotion,

And a great deal of passion,

From sweet summer days,

Of sweat and steam,

Where all was warm,

All was home,

Bright days laced with hope,

Of New Years,

Carefree waltz's among the wood,

Enjoying all there was,

And all that could be,

But that was long ago,

When the sun shone bright,

Now it is a distant memory,

Of the days in the grass,

With no shoes or worry,

Far away, taken in winter's whisper,

Now a small love lingers,

Flowing forth at times of reunion,

But otherwise unknown,

A beautiful care,

An eternal empathy,

Of care and hope,

For themselves,

And for all,

How great to be a human,

On this fine morning,

Full of reunion.


. . .


I've developed long term memory issues over the past few years, so I tried to capture everything I wanted to remember from that time that mattered.