“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.” – Og Mandino
My intention in this article is not to preach to you about being a better person, and how kindness and love can fix all the world’s problems. I do not believe anyone is perfect. And to be completely honest we all have those days where all you want to do is just pull the covers over your head and not deal with anyone at all. However, I do think that kindness can be contagious, and I really believe that being just a little bit nicer can make you feel happier. So, I have composed a list of a few simple ways to try and spread some good old-fashioned kindness. They do not require much time or effort, and if you just pick a few to do each day, I promise you will start to notice a change in your day to day happiness.
1. Hold the door open for someone.
This is something that just really isn’t that hard to do. It takes only a few extra seconds and it makes someone else feel noticed. The same thing goes for elevators. We are all always in a rush to get somewhere sooner, but letting the elevator doors close on someone is not the way to do that. Have a tiny bit more patience and you never know, that karma may come back to you when you are the next person running to catch a closing elevator door.
2. Try to be as inclusive as you can be
Odds are if it does not matter to you, it probably matters a lot to someone else. Having some extra person’s presence at a party or dinner will probably not make a huge difference to you, but it will make a huge difference to the person who would otherwise be sitting home alone and overthinking a situation that he or she has been left out of. No one likes to feel that way, so do not be the person causing others to feel excluded.
3. Give a non-physical compliment every day
While of course it is nice and easy to give compliments to people about a piece of clothing, new haircut, or awesome accessories, it is sort of a shortcut practice. Complimenting a physical quality is still good, but it feels even more meaningful when you receive a compliment about your personality, or the way you handled a situation. Odds are complimenting someone in a non-physical way will resonate with them for longer and make a bigger impact on their confidence.
4. Ask someone how their day went before you start venting
This may seem like a silly one, but you would be surprised at how big of a difference this can make. Believe it or not it makes people feel good when you show the slightest bit interest in their lives too. #NotEveryThingIsAboutYou
5. Send the text
We all have had that awkward feeling when deciding whether or not to text someone happy birthday when you have not spoken in a while, or if you may not consider yourselves as close as you once were. My suggestion is to always do it. You are likely the one who is overthinking it and in reality the person will just feel special because you thought of them. Your text may even stand out to them and make their day, especially if they were not expecting something from you. Make someone’s day brighter!
6. Thank your teachers
Same thing applies here. Don’t overthink it. It may seem silly or awkward to reach out after a few months or even years of speaking with a teacher, but just letting them know you appreciate them or that something they taught you came back to help you, can really make an impact on that teacher’s decisions and mindset. Let people know that they impacted you. They will love it! People appreciate knowing what they are doing can make a long lasting impression.
7. Make eye contact with the person you are talking to
You won’t believe how big of a difference this makes. Not only is it just plain rude to be staring at your phone or multitasking while someone is trying to speak to you, but looking directly into someone’s eyes makes the other person feel accounted for and demonstrates a genuine level of caring. This is also just common courtesy which is important in any relationships, work experience and interviews.
8. Try and do at least one generous thing each day
Growing up we all learned “sharing is caring”. This schoolyard rhyme still applies today. It does not have to be a big gesture. Whether it be lending someone a pen in class, sharing your notes, sharing your favorite shirt with a friend, or giving a homeless person money for some food, all of it counts. It is hard to not be stingy or psychotic about lending your stuff out, but just practicing a few acts of generosity will make you feel better. Studies show that people who were given an amount of money and spent it on other people felt overall happier than people who spent the money on themselves. It’s science people!
9. Try to complain less
This is a hard one. I am SUCH a complainer. When it is cold out, I find myself subconsciously preaching, “I’m so cold.” And in similar situations, “I’m so full” like a broken record. But if we can all just limit ourselves one time a day from saying a complaint, it will save everyone around us some dreaded anger and resentment, and yourself from feeling annoying.
10. Don’t leave people hanging
It is okay to be busy and be a little late sometimes; it’s the story of, well, everyone’s life. But if you are going to be late or you are too busy to meet up or make a plan, let the other person know. It’s no fun waiting around for someone to respond, or getting no response at all. If you are constantly waiting around for someone else, you can’t help feeling like your time is being wasted.
11. Share your time
This goes for volunteering, listening, and just being there. I am sure we all have hectic schedules but making time every once in a while to volunteer or give back in some way will definitely shed some light on your life. This too, does not always have to be something big. It can be just stopping on the street to sign a petition or listening to a friend vent about their problems. Sharing your time, although it can be hard, may result in you making a realization in your life, possibly creating longer term relationships and identifying interests.
A really big part of all of this is to remember the reason why you are doing it in the first place. The goal of simple acts of kindness is to help someone else and not to expect a thank you. Being kind should be selfless. Of course, there are benefits that you reap like feeling good about yourself for doing a good deed, but the reason for doing it was not so that you could boost your own confidence. With that being said, motivate yourself to spread a little kindness and remember, “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless” - Mother Teresa.
