So, folks, without further ado, here are the nine stages of the true Midwestern Goodbye.
GiphyThe beginning of every good ol' Midwestern goodbye starts with the stand and welp. This means you know you have to leave, but you're not getting out of there anytime soon. The welp only functions as a signal for others that you must begin the process of leaving.
GiphyThe next step in saying goodbye is the hugs. Everyone gets one, be it grandma, grandpa, your weird uncle, all the babies, even the dog gets a goodbye hug. This is by far the lengthy step, because a Midwestern hug is a whole different breed of long drawn out hug.
GiphyOnce everyone has gotten a goodbye squeeze, the walk begins. Every Midwesterner knows that no matter how many steps away the door is, it will take no less than 20 minutes to get there during the stages of a goodbye. You have to talk about how good the food was or when you plan to see each other next, no matter the subject, the walk to the door always takes a hot minute.
GiphyGetting to the door is hard, but don't even get me started on the mid-doorway chat. This conversation has literally nothing to do with anything and most of the time involves a lot of belly laughs. This conversation can range anywhere from five minutes to 45 minutes. We really hope you went to the bathroom before you tried to leave because if not, you start the goodbye process from square one all over again.
GiphyThis simple statement signals that you must end the doorway conversation and begin the descent to the car.
GiphyOnce the first hour has elapsed and the sun is setting, the second round of hugs begins. This time, there is less talking but significantly more back patting and side swaying. This time, the goal is solely to get out the door and you really have your eye on the prize... the doorknob.
GiphyAlmost there, the knob is in hand, BUT WAIT, there's another conversation to go still, you can't leave until someone says "goodbye" in a weird voice and sparks more laughter or your dad and uncle starting doing that thing where they quote movies until they laugh so hard they cry. At this point, at least an hour has passed and you've moved 10 feet.
Season 6 GIF by Paramount+GiphyAs you make your way down to the driveway, there is yet another conversation about whatever may arise. Who knows what time it is at this point, all you know is that it's been at least long enough to digest the huge Midwestern meal you just ate, and it's time for a snack.
GiphyOnce you've FINALLY made it out of the house and into your car, you can fully expect that Midwestern hospitality window wave as you pull away. The only correct response to your grandma's porch light flickering wave is a series of honks to let them know that you truly care about the traditional goodbye.
all stars lol GIF by LifetimeGiphy
What someone does for a living can tell a lot about who they are and what they're interested in! Their career reveals a lot more about them than just where they spend their time to make some money.
OK, I get it, this seems like something you would ask a Kindergarten class, but I feel like it's always good to know someone's favorite color. You could always send them that Snapchat featuring you in that cute shirt you have that just so happens to be in their favorite color!
This one is actually super important because it's totally true that people grow up with different roles and responsibilities based on where they fall in the order. You can tell a lot about someone just based on this seemingly simple question.
OK, maybe this isn't a super important question, but you have to know ASAP if you can quote Michael Scott or not. If not, he probably isn't the one. Sorry, girl.
You can then proceed to do the thing that every girl does without admitting it and see how compatible your zodiacs are.
If you're like me, you have big goals that you want to reach someday, and you want a man behind you who also has big goals and understands what it's like to chase after a dream. If his biggest goal is to see how quickly he can binge-watch "Grey's Anatomy" on Netflix, you may want to move on.
This is a go-to for an insight into their personality. Based on how they answer, you can tell if they're goofy, serious, or somewhere in between.
For some, this may be a hard question if it involves a family member or friend who has since passed away. For others, it may revolve around a tradition that no longer happens. The answers to this question are almost endless!
We all have parts of our lives and stories that we wish we could change. It's human nature to make mistakes. This question is a little bit more personal but can really build up the trust level.
shallow focus photography of dog and catPhoto by Anusha Barwa on UnsplashI mean, duh! If you're a dog person, and he is a cat person, it's not going to work out.
Personally, I am a Christian, and as a result, I want to be with someone who shares those same values. I know some people will argue that this question is too much in the talking stage, but why go beyond the talking stage if your personal values will never line up?
Even homebodies have a must visit place on their bucket list!
Hey, if you're going to go for it... go for it!
For me, it was hands-down Nick Jonas. This is always a fun question to ask!
Let's be real, if you put a label on it, you're not going to see your significant other at their best 24/7.
This can lead to some really good conversations, especially if they have a tattoo that has a lot of meaning to them!
It's always interesting to see if how the person you're talking to views their personal traits lines ups with the vibes you're getting.
This question can go multiple different directions, and it could also be a launching pad for other conversations.
Admittedly, I have asked this question to friends as well, but it's neat to see what people value.
Work hard, play hard, right?
a scrabbled wooden block spelling the word prizePhoto by Brett Jordan on UnsplashThis is always interesting because no matter how compatible your personalities may be, if one of you wants to be serious and the other is looking for something casual, it's just not going to work.
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