Those are probably two words you wouldn’t expect to hear from your “Plan B” herself. But even then, here I am saying thank you. You have taught me to love myself and to prioritize the things that make me happy, rather than allowing myself to be taken for granted. You taught me to never settle for anything less than I deserve because life is far too short to surround myself with people who will only run to me when they need help. I can lend an ear and even a helping hand, but I cannot be your safety card. More than anything, thank you for allowing me to learn that every relationship—whether it involves a friend or a passing stranger—is a two-way street, and I have the choice to take the exit when the road gets bumpy.
Don’t take it the wrong way—I am not saying to leave as soon as something gets “too hard” or “challenging.” Rather, know when to let go. Relationships are more than give-and-take. There is a fine line between “too much” and “too little”—it’s OK to be Goldilocks and pick what is just right for me, even if it meant cutting ties with you. Because of you, I have learned to never seek attention or affection—if it wasn’t freely given in the first place, I’m better off without it. You have taught me that it wasn’t worth holding on to someone who never considered me more than a supporting role in the grand play of things.
I am a listener, but I am not your therapist. You came to me when things got hard, taking advantage of my willingness to listen and help. You wanted to be alongside me at your worst, but forgot me at your best.
I am a supporter, but I am not your fan. I was there to cheer you on, but you let me get comfortable on the side-line.
I am a giver, but I am not at your disposal. I was there in your time of need, whether it was 3 a.m. or in middle of class, but know that your problems weren’t any bigger or smaller than mine or the person next to you.
So thank you—thank you for being one of the biggest teachers in my life. You have taught me what I am and what I am not, but most of all, you taught me that I the best choice is to never allow myself to become the second choice.
