Apologizing Doesn't Make Using The N-Word OK

I Don't Want Your Apology For Saying The N-Word, I Want You To Stop Saying It

Are you actually sorry for your actions or is it just normal to apologize?

hannahd
hannahd
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The word sorry just doesn't hold as much meaning as it used to me feel like.

When we were younger we used to apologize for hitting another kid or if you knocked down a kid at recess. One of the definitions for sorry was "feeling distressed, especially through sympathy with someone else's misfortune." The other definition they had stated "feeling regret or penitence."

I don't know about you guys but I have been one to apologize a lot, heck I even say sorry when I don't notice someone behind me when the door closes behind me. Now we're going to turn the tables BIG time and how when people think it's OK to say the N-word jokingly and then notice I am in the room and apologize.

Heck yes, we are going to talk about this.

When apologizing to someone to you truly mean it or do you just say it because you're used to immediately apologizing because that is the normal thing to do? If you were truly apologizing you'd give reason to it, but people just say sorry to get out of an argument or even avoid one. If you think someone is mad at you, you don't even bother really asking what happened you just apologized to avoid the confrontation.

Call me crazy but sometimes some good old confrontation is just what the doctor ordered. You could be having all these pent-up feelings and emotions that sorry just won't patch up. Even if it does patch them up, imagine that it's a bandage and you just got in the shower, now the bandage is useless and to me that how I see the word sorry!

That is personally just me because people have apologized (including myself) and saying sorry really isn't crap anymore. I have got to the point where people say sorry I say, "you really aren't sorry." Depending on the situation if you were sorry you would not have done whatever it is in the first place.

Now, if that isn't a hard pill to swallow, then I don't know what is.

Now if you are apologizing to someone for their misfortune that is an entire different situation in which the sorry could be sincere, which I hope it is and you are being a heartless witch and if you are, then you need to step back and get it together because at that point you're being rude and shouldn't be around that person, to begin with.

Now, the "N" word. Let's get awkward, shall we? People say a lot "Oh, I would never say that around you." Keywords there you guys is "around you." PLEASE tell me why you wouldn't say it around me? Oh, I know why, because you don't want to hurt my feelings right? Exactly my point. You won't say the word around me but you have your group messages named things like "My N****s" or something like that, am I right? I know I'm right because I've seen it. People have shown me their phones and a group message will pop up on their phone or their Snapchat and I will see it and they will say sorry.

No, if you were sorry you wouldn't have named the group chat that.

You are apologizing because you ASSUME that I'll go off on you or you hurt my feelings. The N-word came from the eighth century as an adaptation of the Spanish "negro." By the mid-20th century, it was used as an unambiguously racist insult. Basically, the entire point of this is that it is DISRESPECTFUL. Even when you say "Oh, my black friend so-and-so" like yes, I am black, thanks for telling me as if I didn't know? I find it very funny that people are SO quick to defend their friends of color when someone else might call them or use the N-word but are even quicker to use it when they aren't around. Being black already makes us stand out enough we don't need people calling us racial slurs on top of it. We have names, try using them once in a while and stop apologizing for things you aren't sorry for.

The whole point of this was to show you what "sorry" can really mean or not mean in some circumstances.

Next time you think something might hurt someone, take a look in the mirror and try to put them in your shoes. This is something we all need to practice. I find myself saying sorry for things that I don't really think about much either.

"If you have no critics you'll likely have no success" — Malcolm X

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13 Signs You Grew Up In The 2000s

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The 2000s, generally referred to as the decade falling between 2000 and 2009. However, these 10 years were so much more dear to our hearts and definitely cannot be limited to this simplified definition. From hopes that you had the best kooky pen collection, to dreaming about making it to see the year 3000, there was never a dull moment. So, put on those terry cloth sweatpants, charge up that nano iPod, and read about the signs that prove you grew up in the best decade:

1. You might have jammed out to “Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne on your nano IPod

Yes you had one, and your playlists consisted of the best songs the 2000s had to offer; All American Rejects, Fall Out Boy, The Killers and of course Avril Lavigne.

2. You treated your tamagotchi as if it were your child

This hand held digital pet probably occupied a little too much of your time. You spent your days feeding it scones and watching them reach a new life cycle.

3. Your wardrobe consisted of every color Juicy sweatsuit and Ed hardy tees...

Thank god these terrycloth outfits made a comeback!... Right?

4. ... Oh, and gauchos, you LOVED gauchos

These pants took over your wardrobe before yoga pants came into your life. Gauchos flooded the playground in pink, blue and tie-dye. I miss you gauchos.

5. You had the debate with your friends over whether Webkinz or Club Penguin was better, but you begged your parents for a membership to both

As soon as you logged onto your account your afternoon was booked up. While on your Webkinz you visited the curio shop, got a checkup with Dr. Quack, made a hamburger in the employment office and played cash cow in the arcade.

6. Your friends always had these in their pantry

At the end of a long, hard day of multiplication, going to your friends house for a playdate and indulging in a cosmic brownie was a necessity.

7. This was your first experience with makeup, and a cell phone

This accessory gave the lyrics "my lipgloss is cool my lipgloss be poppin" a whole new meaning. Pretending to answer the phone while smearing your lips in every color imaginable; this was the perfect mix of feeling like you were a teenager while also staying true to your child like self.

8. Lizzie Mcguire was the first ever Bitmoji

You watched her on Disney Channel as Lizzie McGuire, admired her fashion sense, and sang to "Hey Now" an endless amount of times. Hillary Duff was the definition of goals.

9. The auctioning off of silly bandz in elementary school was basically Wallstreet

The must have accessory of the 2000s.

10. You would beg your mom to buy you lunchables when you walked down the frozen food isle

Looking back on it now, eating these was probably not the best idea.

11. You had a favorite Jonas Brother

And it was NEVER Kevin.

12. You dreamed of riding around in a JetX just like the kids in PCA

You put getting a JetX on your To-Do list right under making a key necklace.

13. Instead of homework, your after school activities consisted of watching THE BEST Disney Channel and Nickelodeon shows

Disney Channel and Nickelodeon will sadly never be the same. Classics include: Hannah Montana, Ned's Declassified, Suite Life of Zack and Cody and That's so Raven.

Don't you want to just go back in time and bask in the simple days where all you cared about was how good your blue eyeshadow looked and when the next Disney Channel Original movie would come on?

Cover Image Credit: flickr

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How The Rhetoric Of 'White Privilege' Is Used Incorrectly

Social Commentary: Maria Costello

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White privilege is a term that has been thrown around in American politics without the right context or consideration for what it means. The most common use of this ambiguous term in modern political conversation is that it acts as a social force that advantages the white community by affording it "perks" that minority races are not afforded. Furthermore, because this force advantages those of white skin tone, the white community is therefore unaware of its advantages and cannot speak to the "suffering" of minorities. In the current political debate, this term has been used in such a way as to go so far as to shut down the success of non-minorities by chalking up their success to their so-called privilege.

This use of white privilege is highly problematic. Firstly, it conflates privilege with racism. This is an important notion to consider because it misrepresents the term in a way that lends itself to miscommunication. It has become a term in modern conversation used to shut down those who are not of minority status; therefore, instead of speaking about white privilege for what it is, a false correlation between being privileged and being racist has developed. Simply because someone was born with supposed advantages does not mean that he is oppressing those who were not. The way that white privilege is used in the news assumes that if you are not of the minority, you must, therefore, be contributing to the marginalization of that minority by nature of your privilege. This notion is ridiculous because it assumes that America is inherently a racist country where the reason that white people get ahead is because of their privilege. It is easy to blame the advantages of one race over another on racist ideology; however, white privilege has nothing to do with racism itself. In fact, white privilege is no different than normal privilege, but by coining it as "white", the term has been weaponized in politics to shut down certain points of view.

The environment that a person grows up in can afford them privileges that others don't have. When one group of people has advantages another does not, that is called privilege and it is no different when it comes to white privilege. White people have advantages that minorities do not. That does not make white people inherently racist, it simply means they have advantages. Let's take a closer look at the most popular example of white privilege cited in modern political conversation: Living without the fear of being arbitrarily racially profiled.

The most commonly referenced example of arbitrary bias against the black community regards unfair assumptions of criminality. There are a few aspects of white privilege to consider when looking at this issue. In regards to mortality rates at the hand of cops, yes, according to whole population statistics, black people are more likely to get shot by police than white people. However, according to accredited professor Peter Moskos at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, for example, when the statistics being used are looking specifically at homicide cases in the black vs white community, white people are more likely to die at the hands of the cops on the scene of the crime than blacks. This statistic gets skewed in whole population data because the rates of murder cases are far higher in the black community; therefore, on the whole, more African-Americans die.

To be clear, this does not debunk the existence of white privilege. There is clear proof of arbitrary racial profiling against the Hispanic and African-American communities when it comes to law enforcement. However, according to Department of Justice crime statistics, a much larger percentage of the African-American and Hispanic communities commit crimes than in the white community. What this leads to is a social generalization that is formed against disproportionately violent minority communities which says, "if you are part of that community, you must be violent." This assumption, of course, is false, but it creates a bias where people become more wary of those communities. This does not occur because America is racist. This does not occur because white people are privileged. This occurs because there is a legitimate statistical basis for this bias.

So, after all this, what is white privilege? White privilege is the bias that exists against minority groups that do not exist in the white community. It has nothing to do with actual privilege. It has nothing to do with racism. It is simply a term used to point out how minority communities are being marginalized. We cannot deny the existence of this marginalization, but we also cannot deny that it has a legitimate factual basis that stems from the very communities claiming to be disadvantaged.

The purpose of this article is not to disprove white privilege. The purpose is simply to show that there is often a misrepresentation of what white privilege actually is. The statistics commonly cited to support the weaponized use of the term do not tell the full story, because they assume that correlation is causation. They conveniently leave out other factors that may contribute to statistics that show racial socioeconomic stratification. We must also be careful how we use this term so as not to conflate white privilege with racism in America. Using this term in order to shut down the voices of non-minorities hinders thoughtful debate and does not lead to the betterment of minority status. We should be striving to find common ground through clear communication in order to combat true racism instead of contributing to the division among racial lines through the misuse of terms such as "white privilege."

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