7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup
Start writing a post
Health Wellness

7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup

These unhealthy (but common) habits can lead to unhealthy mindsets.

205
7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup

Sometimes building the right relationship can be hard, and it is incredibly discouraging when you find yourself in a pattern of failed attempts. Throughout the process of meeting someone, it is important to not pretend to be someone else, act like you care less than you do or even blame yourself if things don't end up working out. Here are seven things that people say about relationships that--in the end--can be detrimental.

1. “I ruined everything.”

78.media.tumblr.com

Sometimes people are too quick to find fault in themselves as to why something didn't work out exactly as planned. They believe that if they had been less awkward, less needy or less stupid, things may have gone differently. The truth is, sometimes situations simply don't work out and it is never any one person's fault. We need to stop being conditioned to immediately believe that we were in the wrong and are to blame for somehow sabotaging everything.

2. "If I seem cool enough, they will take notice of me.”

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com

While it is a good thing to put yourself out there and gain some confidence, it is vital to not think that you must change yourself in order for someone to notice you. If it takes you altering your image or acting like a completely different person in order to get someone you like back, it's time to question if all that effort over one person is really worth your time.

3. “I need to make them jealous.”

media1.tenor.com

I admit that a very quick way to catch someone's attention is to stir up a little jealousy. This may involve paying lots of attention to a person on a night out and laughing a little louder than you should have. While there is no harm in proving to someone that you are well-liked, this behavior of finding satisfaction in another person's jealousy isn't a good basis for ANY future relationship.

4. “I need to play hard to get.”

www.reactiongifs.com

I think the biggest problem when it comes to new relationships is that people are unwilling to be vulnerable and honest about their feelings. Instead, we'd rather act like we don't care as much as we actually do. We play hard to get and act uninterested, when that isn't actually how we feel. Instead, I think we should be bold and honest when we talk to our significant others, because that is how commitment, trust and security are gained.

5. “I have to find someone before he/she does.”

www.maxim.com

Sometimes things don't work out as we hope, and the person you had a 'thing' with is no longer in the picture. You may feel slightly hurt, but many people's approach to retaliation is to find a rebound before their ex-partner does. This is probably the WORST thing you can do, not only because it doesn't prove anything and means you are still prioritizing your ex in your life, but it's also not fair to the person you rebound with.

6. “I need to make sure they are still hung up on me.”

media.giphy.com

Breakups suck, but the best thing you can do is stop focusing on how your ex may be handling things and simply work to improve yourself and get over it. It's only natural to want your ex to feel just as poorly as you do (or even worse), especially when you feel terrible yourself. You want the confirmation that you actually meant something to that person, but you can't rely on making them feel just as miserable as you, otherwise you'll never get over them or have a chance to grow yourself.

7. “I wasn’t good enough.”

i.gifer.com

Please, please, PLEASE never tell yourself this when something doesn't work out or if things haven't worked out several times in a row. There is nothing wrong with you. You need to know your worth and look for someone you truly deserve. Never settle for anything less, and, if that takes multiple failed attempts at relationships, don't take it as a testament to your "undesirability," your "unattractiveness" or an inability to live up to expectations.

Instead, we should try to be honest with ourselves about how we feel, what we deserve and who we want to be. The best types of relationships stem from a level of vulnerability and an effort to improve and love oneself instead of relying on other people to determine your worth.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

40623
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

25227
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

950845
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

132713
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments