I believe in compromise—in truth, in honesty, in respect. In my opinion, the most important factor in a romantic relationship between you and your partner is to talk things out when things get rough.
Why do I think compromise so important? Essentially, it allows you and your partner to balance each other’s needs by considering both of your positions, which leads to mutual understanding between the two of you as well as a solution to the main issue. As a direct result of understanding you each have sacrificed something in order to share the solution with your partner, both of you will gain each other’s trust, and in doing so, commitment.
A good relationship is built on a strong foundation of trust, commitment, and compromise. Trust can waver when you feel insecure. Commitment can get shaky when you feel uncertain. Compromise, though, always exists regardless of how you feel. Should you and your partner continue to compromise on issues between you two, trust and commitment will continue to stand strong and stable.
If you are unhappy with the way your partner is too “this” or too “that,” you should talk to him or her about the situation. Say how you feel about the issue rather than accusing your partner of doing or being “this” or “that.” For example, say, “I don’t like it when you play games too much,” instead of outright stating, “you play games too much.” The first is honest and emotional. It’s how you feel. The second is very accusatory and will put your partner on the spot. Be polite and try to work things out between you in a collaborative manner.
Do not panic if your partner refuses to compromise. Consider this: If it is their first time working out a resolution seriously with a partner, they might see compromise as a weakness or a foreign idea. A saying exists that goes, “it is better to lose the battle in order to win the war.” There will be times where you have to stomach your pride in order to come to a resolution during an argument. But if your partner refuses to compromise, you may have to completely step back for the sake of preserving the relationship, which is more important than winning an argument. For now, it might be troublesome to to let your partner have his or her way, but in the long run, it is worth the trouble. You will maintain a positive relationship and you will know how to resolve problems in the future.
Choosing not to compromise may cost you the relationship in the long run, because similar problems that will not resolve themselves will arise even if both partners have forgotten the specific issue. If it hasn’t been worked out between the two of you, ignoring it will not make it better. If you have a partner who never compromises, then you should rethink the relationship and where it might be headed in the long run. Are you likely to continue giving up and sacrificing for the sake of your partner when he/she is unwilling to do the same for you? Are you content with the state your relationship is in right now? I don’t have the answer to that, because the answer should lie within you.
In the end, it is up to you to decide what you want to do. But if you truly believe you want to preserve your relationship with your significant other, then take a stab at compromising because it can most definitely improve your relationship in ways you might not have thought possible.
