Whether or not you believe that this article is meant to be taken to seriously, it's still objectifying and promotes the idea that treating or desiring women this way is acceptable. Whether you are a member of Greek life or not, we should all treat others with the respect that they deserve. Relationships should not only promote respect, but honesty and acceptance (without senseless limitations). Honestly, if whoever wrote this article were to go try and find a girlfriend (which I doubt he is ready to be in a serious relationships based on this list) he would have problems finding one. Additionally, if he is in a relationship, I would encourage him to reevaluate his values on what constitutes a valuable relationship. Overall perpetuating sexism is never funny, some of the comments underneath your article were chilling to read, especially being someone who speaks actively against sexual assault one of them being... "If we’re equals, then why is it so easy to push her head down and gag her?". Imagine reading this article to your sister, mother, or woman you actually do respect... would it still be funny?
It shocks me that people still think that we don't need feminism. The hypocrisy in this article is not only there, but it is blatant. I'm expected to always look good, be young, and keep my downstairs tidy, but not care about what you look like. I'm suppose to be honest with you, but not expect the same (see 39 and 40). We are expected to nurse you back to health and cook for you, but not be your mother (see 4 and 22). Overall the article lowers the humanity of females, and as a result promotes objectification, rape culture, misogyny, and unhealthy relationships. Women don't owe you shit. They are not objects made for your personal pleasure. My body is MY body. As a human I can be whomever I want to be (too much or too little) and still be a great girlfriend. Of course you have your first amendment right to say whatever you like, but it also gives me the right to call you out on your blatant misogyny.
1. "Be younger than us"
Why? So you can date someone who is just as immature as you? Be grateful for any woman that would give you attention after this article.
2. "Enjoy whiskey"
I didn't know that whiskey affected my value as a girlfriend? What if she doesn't drink... does that lessen her value even more (by the sounds of it, it probably does). Honestly, I don't think you care what she likes to drink, as long as she gets drunk.
3. "Be able to shotgun a beer at a reasonable pace"
See response number two.
4. "Handle your alcohol"
Yeah same goes for you. Are you trying to tell us to drink responsibly... because I'm sure you don't.
5. "Don't be an emotional drunk"
I'm a human being, I'm entitled to whatever emotion I want.
6. "There's nothing less sexy than insecurity. Except maybe love handles."
My body, is MY body. I am allowed to feel sexy with or without love handles. It's comments like that, which fuel insecurity. In fact, I would propose that writing your own article, you had some insecurities yourself.
7. "Make us work for it. But only a little bit."
Yeah, we'll make you work for it, because we are trying to figure out if you're a decent human being...
8. "Be nice to our pledges... but not too nice"
Don't tell me what to do?
9. "Hook our friends up with your friends"
I'm not your matchmaker or your wingman
10. "Understand the rules of football"
... I wouldn't want to emasculate you.
11. "Don't be clingy"
How about an open and honest relationship? Tell me when you feel like you're being smothered.
12. "Be someone we'd want to hang out with sober"
13. "Don't have annoying friends"
If you don't like my friends, you don't like me. Also don't tell me who I can be friends with, you're not my parent. I'm not going to plan my friends around you.
14. "You don't have to like beer, but at least tolerate it"
Again, I don't feel like you actually care what I like to drink. Also what about shotgunning a beer, aren't you contradicting your own point? I'll do what I like.
15. "Have an attractive mother"
Ok, my mom is the most gorgeous lady on earth, but that's beside the point. Don't sexualize my mother, especially if you're my boyfriend. It's disturbing.
16. "Don't rush the initial girlfriend talk"
By the sounds of it I wouldn't want to be your girlfriend anyway. If you find my mom so attractive why don't you date her... oh wait... you want someone younger than you (see response one).
17. "Have a fake ID"
18. "It should go without saying, but you should be in a sorority"
I don't think any girl in my sorority would be interested in dating you, let alone me. Also what does greek life have to do with it?
19. "Bake us something from scratch"
Not your cook, not your housecleaner, not your mother.
20. "Don't look like your just rolled out of bed"
Again f**k off. I look beautiful always. Also what if I did just roll out of bed?
21. Help us study (read: sell us your or your friend's adderall)
How about actually studying and gaining even just a small amount of intelligence?
22. Nurse us back to health on Sunday morning"
I'm not your damn mother.
23. Don't go through our phones.
I won't, because I know what privacy is
24. "If you choose to wear heels, don’t complain to us when they’re uncomfortable"
You're suppose to be my boyfriend... aka I'm suppose to be able to talk to you about anything (even if it's complaining)
25. "We don’t need to know the specifics of your period. A simple warning will do"
See response number 24. Also is the same thing your going to say to your daughter. Is this how you're going to treat your daughter?
26. "Keep your rabid insatiable love for Luke Bryan to yourself, and off of our iPhones."
It sounds like we have none of the same interests.
27. "Never ask us to watch “Magic Mike” with you. It isn’t going to happen."
Ok, double standards... don't make me watch football with you.
28. "Eventually we’re going to ask you for a threesome. Either accept or divert our attention with a blowjob. No tantrum necessary"
Respecting my choice and my sexual preference would be great too.
29. "Before you do anything, ask yourself “Would a psychopath do this?”
Because you're assuming all girls act like a psychopath now.
30. "Don’t make our brothers hate you"
31. Warn us if you’ve hooked up with one of our fraternity brothers.
It's none of your damn business
32. "Don’t expect us to take you on 8 dates a week"
1. There are seven days in a week. 2. As if you would take me on more than one a month.
33. "Make sure our dog likes you."
Ok this isn't a problem, because I'm pretty sure I'll like your dog more than you.
34. "Keep your downstairs tidy."
It's my body, I can do whatever I want to do with it. It isn't there to please you.
35. "Remember that you’re our girlfriend, not our mother."
Then why do you keep asking me to take care of you? See response twenty-two.
36. "If we stop texting you, assume we’re just asleep until we’ve given you reason to think otherwise."
Seems like your sure know how to be in a healthy relationship. Not emotionally abusive at all.
37. "Unless we bring her up, don’t talk about our ex-girlfriend."
38. "Don’t talk about your ex-boyfriend, unless it’s to tell us how much better we are."
39. "If you ask us how many people we’ve had sex with, you can’t get mad at the answer."
Same, I don't shame people on how many people they've slept with.
40. "Lie about how many people you’ve had sex with."
We should be okay with your number, but you can't be okay with ours? See response thirty-nine.
41. "Make sure our formal cooler doesn’t look like a five year-old fingerpainted it."
Paint it yourself.
42. "We hate condoms, and everyone hates abortions. You’re a grown up now, it’s time to get on the pill."
Why should pregnancy prevention be only my responsibility? Also there are other reasons to wear a condom...like stds
43. "Look good naked."
I'll look however I want to look. It's MY body, not yours.
44. "Realize #43 applies to the entire relationship, not just the beginning."
See response number forty-three
45. "We will never be Channing Tatum. Deal with it."
It's quite obvious you're not Channing Tatum. Our dream guy wouldn't treat us like this.
46-50. "Did I mention blowjobs?"
I shouldn't have to do anything that I don't want to do. I don't live to please you. Nor am I obligated to do anything. Part of being in a good relationship is respecting other people's boundaries.