Back in 2015, I came under the realization that I was different.
What do I mean? I had dreams of dating and being in relationships with men and women. At first, I was freaked out, then ignored it. Time and time again, the same dreams kept popping up in my sleep. Again, I ignored it. Soon after, I began to feel emotionally and sexually attracted to women. Soon after, I told my parents about it, and that I might be bisexual. They were both supportive, and said that "as long as I'm happy, they're happy."
I told my best friend about it, and she was supportive as well. They were the least of my worries. My main worry was what the rest of my family was going to think.
In May/June of this year, I was watching American Idol as I was getting my nails done. There was a contestant who sung "Rise" by Katy Perry for his audition. Hearing him sing the song had me emotional, and then it hit me: I needed to stop I hiding who I was and be myself no matter what.
I purchased a bisexual flag online. Then, I designed a t-shirt for me to purchase and wear for my hometown's gay pride festival (that took place in August). On the day of the Gay Pride festival, I bought another bisexual flag and wore it as a cape, and wore the t-shirt I designed. It felt so good for me to be myself. After the festival, I went back home to join a family gathering and didn't bother changing my shirt. No one reacted or responded to the shirt.
Fast forward to September 19th. I wrote posts in certain LGBTQ+ Facebook groups re-introducing who I am. Soon after I wrote the posts, there were a few people who randomly requested to be my friend and messaged me. The messages and friend requests upset me, and I wrote a post about it.
A few minutes after I wrote the post about what happened, one of the members of the Facebook group responded to the post saying that I am actually homoflexible. Then, I googled what homoflexible was, and saw this on Urban Dictionary's website: "Describes someone attracted primarily to members of the same sex (homosexual), but occasionally attracted to members of the opposite sex AND/OR able to derive pleasure from romantic encounters with members of the opposite sex."
Soon after I read the definition, I began to notice how irritated I would get when talking to men, and how happy I feel speaking to women. That's when I realized everything made sense.
I hope my story of learning and rediscovering who I am inspires people to never be afraid of who they are, and that there are people around you and online who are willing to lend an ear to what you have to say and how you feel.
