Recognizing The Similarities and Differences From My Parents

Usually, in families, people start to look for similarities in the physical features present.

It makes sense, those are the most obvious.

For me, I got my dad's blue eyes, my mom's body shape, and I inherited the subtle waviness of both of my parents' hair which resulted in my curls.

But if you look a little deeper into your own family, and perhaps into other families you can start to notice other inherited traits that arise in personalities.

In the past few years as I have gotten older I have started to see what parts of my personality come from each of my parents. I have been especially mindful of the similarities and differences this summer.

I have come to figure out that while I have a mixture of personality traits from both of my parents, my personality has a bit more in common with my mom's than with my dad's.

My mom is laid back and is able to be passive and go with the flow, which I also see in myself. Often, neither of us have strong preferences for what we do with our day or what restaurant we choose to eat dinner at.

But there are also times when I want my day to be regimented and scheduled out. Where I need to have a clear idea of what is going to happen and when. This preference for structure is something I get from my dad.

He wants to have a map planned out for his days. He gets antsy when he doesn't have the next thing planned.

This summer, we would be trying to do something together or plan something and ask what I had planned for the day. Given it's the summer, if I had the day off from work, I wouldn't have an agenda for the day. This fluidity wouldn't sit well with my dad and he would make a plan out of it.

He would then lay out how we would arrange our day and I would just go along with it expressing my mom's passivity responding often with, "Sure, that works for me, I don't care.

I am not always this passive though.

I also inherited a strong dose of my dad's stubbornness.

This causes my dad and me to often butt heads.

We both like being right. So if there is an occasion where I see my dad doing something wrong or getting a fact wrong. I am quick to correct him.

Often times this gets me into trouble because of how strong willed my dad is and how he hates to be wrong.

We'll get into bouts of trying to be the one to get the last word in, the other always wanting to be the one who is right in the end.

If my mom is involved she'll be the peacemaker and tell us to give up the debate and move onto something else.

There are things that my dad does that drive me bananas whereas my mom just sits there and lets them wash over her.

I have often asked her how she puts up with these moments where what my dad does may irritate both of us, but she just lets it go.

She claims it's because she has spent over 25 years, but I also think it is because she is more laid back than I am.

I have been trying to draw on the passivity that I have gotten from my mom when my dad irritates me, but often though it's not without letting a couple of sassy comments out before going quiet.

No matter how old I get I don't think I will ever be able to be as calm as my mom is around my dad. But that's because I am a mix of the two of them.

I will have my mom's humor, caring nature, and a sprinkle of passiveness, but also in the mix of my personality is my dad's competitive nature and his stubbornness.

I am happy with my personality though and think I am a good mix of the two.

So take a moment the next time you are around both of your parents and think about which parts of your personality you got from which parent.

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